Is it normal that i constantly worry in a relationship?

So I was in a relationship with a guy for more than a year. Once I realized how much I cared about him, I would have what I would call "anxiety attacks" whenever he went out. I would daydream that he got in a car accident or that someone would shoot or rob him wherever he was or that, if he was playing sports with friends, someone would hurt him. I think it might have something to do with the fact that when the relationship started, he had just torn his ACL and meniscus and had just had surgery, so I was always kind of caring for him. After that surgery, he never wore his knee brace when he was supposed to, and I would literally cry when I found out that he hadn't worn it. I would worry so much that it'd get worse and that he'd be in a wheelchair the rest of his life. Another time, he broke his finger at basketball. I knew that the people he was playing with were rough and I told him not to go, but he did anyways and he broke his finger. I cried then too. Then, whenever he would "forget" his splint or "lose" his tape for his finger, I would get super upset too. I just couldn't handle things that other people, including his parents, seemed to not worry about at all. The relationship is over now and I see how crazy I was acting, so I want to know, is that kind of behavior normal or do I really need to see a therapist of some sort to talk about my anxiety issues? I'm scared of getting in a new relationship now because I fear that behavior will return and make me miserable and drive him away like in this last relationship. Help!

Is It Normal?
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Comments ( 4 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • You drove him away by trying to show how much you cared but he wanted a gf not another mother.

    To be honest, you sound too immature to be in a serious relationship, keep it casual and have some fun!

    Concentrate on yourself if you meet someone new, a man will find that more attractive - that you've a life beyond him so you're not going to suffocate him especially if you are not always available.

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    • A serious relationship is what I'm looking for, though. Do casual relationships eventually get serious after enough time? I think too much about the future I guess.

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      • Of course they do, that's how they develop! As long as you don't go sleeping with them before they promise monogamy. At least that's what the Millionaire Matchmaker says ;o)

        The more you date, the more you can decide what you do and/or don't like in a potential mate. You've to kiss a lot of frogs before you meet the prince. The best relationships are when you start as friends so don't do that Friends With Benefits crap!

        Good luck!

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        • thank you, stranger! your words have been enlightening. my next relationship will go very differently. :]

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