Adoption is in ill repute because of stories of failure and the hardships that are portrayed in popular media. It is rare for a foster relationship in movie/series/book to be portrayed as harmonious. There are reasons for this, though I doubt that most foster relationships run the course so often portrayed, though it is true that often the relationships are... more difficult.
Societies are built upon values and customs which have developed over centuries. Until fairly recently adoption was practiced mainly with children of deceased relatives or adults (to continue the name, as reward for a service etc). These customs are difficult to break as people in general do not like to change.
In the developed world, the figures for orphans in homes are fairly similar. For example, the US actually has only 2/3 the per capita figure of Germany.
Another issue is 'when' to adopt. If already existing children are too old (late teen/adult) they will not form a siblings bond to the new member of the family, and may well regard the newcomer as unwelcome competition. Ideally, adoption would take place as close to birth as possible, this, however, might not be ideal due to monetary and time constraints.
As for other nations (nations we do not live in), they are none of our business.
Don't get me wrong, I'm all for adoption. However, I was under the impression that your opinion was a little one-sided and wanted to provide you with some arguments to the contrary, so that you may ponder on them. Clearly some of the notions you had/have were/are erroneous.
In our discussion we moved from "less people should have children, so that more adopt" to "adoption should be promoted and its social stigma lessened".
Lastly, I would like to add that, in my opinion, the number of orphans would be reduced most by combating the source; parents who fail to take care of their children, young parents who put them up for adoption upon childbirth etc.
Is it normal that I believe that having children is wrong?
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Adoption is in ill repute because of stories of failure and the hardships that are portrayed in popular media. It is rare for a foster relationship in movie/series/book to be portrayed as harmonious. There are reasons for this, though I doubt that most foster relationships run the course so often portrayed, though it is true that often the relationships are... more difficult.
Societies are built upon values and customs which have developed over centuries. Until fairly recently adoption was practiced mainly with children of deceased relatives or adults (to continue the name, as reward for a service etc). These customs are difficult to break as people in general do not like to change.
In the developed world, the figures for orphans in homes are fairly similar. For example, the US actually has only 2/3 the per capita figure of Germany.
Another issue is 'when' to adopt. If already existing children are too old (late teen/adult) they will not form a siblings bond to the new member of the family, and may well regard the newcomer as unwelcome competition. Ideally, adoption would take place as close to birth as possible, this, however, might not be ideal due to monetary and time constraints.
As for other nations (nations we do not live in), they are none of our business.
Don't get me wrong, I'm all for adoption. However, I was under the impression that your opinion was a little one-sided and wanted to provide you with some arguments to the contrary, so that you may ponder on them. Clearly some of the notions you had/have were/are erroneous.
In our discussion we moved from "less people should have children, so that more adopt" to "adoption should be promoted and its social stigma lessened".
Lastly, I would like to add that, in my opinion, the number of orphans would be reduced most by combating the source; parents who fail to take care of their children, young parents who put them up for adoption upon childbirth etc.
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MilleBornes
10 years ago
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You are awesome. Thank you for stating, with better affect, the thoughts I had about this situation