no, lots of people do that. One of the funny things I've noticed is that most people who know you probably have discussions - if not arguments - when you're not around of course, as to whether you're gay or not. Denying it doesn't help any. I think that if you're into men (assuming your a male) then go for it. There is a generation of people who will never accept it but you cannot let that stop you. Be true to yourself and your friends, that's a good place to start.
Is it normal that i am gay but deny it to others?
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no, lots of people do that. One of the funny things I've noticed is that most people who know you probably have discussions - if not arguments - when you're not around of course, as to whether you're gay or not. Denying it doesn't help any. I think that if you're into men (assuming your a male) then go for it. There is a generation of people who will never accept it but you cannot let that stop you. Be true to yourself and your friends, that's a good place to start.