Is it normal that i absolutely loathe my best friend?

45% Normal
13 Comments

There is something about my best friend that makes me hate her with all my heart. She competes with me to see if she can get more attention from the guy than i do. In fact, when i was sitting behind this guy that i really liked in a class, she tried everything to make him talk to her even though he would always talk to me. She would make him move his seat to her seat and even interrupts our conversations to say something completely stupid. When she is with me she is normal and in fact is the most depressing, insecure person i have met in my life. And yet, when we're in school ,especially around guys she knows i either like, or she knows she can get attention from them and knows she can hurt me, she puts on this front of happiness and vivacity that over time attracts the guy. I cannot compete with that. She even has a "friends with benefit" that used to be her boyfriend but then he broke up with her because she always wanted presents, never let him hang out with his friends, and she always accused him of cheating on her with me and made him constantly tell her that i was ugly. But yet, he is still emotionally hung on to her. I am 100% sure that if she wasn't there i would have had a boyfriend, but she clings to me and other people. The problem is is that i cant rid my life from her. Its absolutely disgusting. I'm even rooming with her in college, which is the stupidest shit I've ever heard, and yet here i am. I dont know if i should tell her everything that has been bothering me in high school before we room together. or just not say anything and slowly break away from her and make my own friends. She just makes me feel like shit even though i am so much better than she is, but when she puts on the act, i cannot compete with her because i am too realistic but she is always fake, so most of the time i give up and end up letting the guy submit to her and fall in her trap. It really bothers me. She even tries to get the numbers of the guys she knows matter to me and then tells me when she is talking with them. She tries to make it "subtle", but i see right through her. I cannot get rid of her, because she is my best friend. But she has ruined my high school life. I know that she secretly wants me to look bad or tries to exclude me in things because she can. I dont know what to do anymore.

Voting Results
45% Normal
Based on 62 votes (28 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • bleach_baby
    13 years ago

    Oh God do NOT room with this girl in college, she is the sort of person who will ruin your fucking life, I'm not even joking. Apply for a different room and dont tell her about it or something, seriously, I know the type of person you are talking about and she wont feel good about herself til you feel like absolute shit. When I went into sixth form at a new school, one of my best friends moved with me..I always had time for him, but I made alot more friends than him, which was the reverse of what had been true at our previous school. He couldnt handle it and spread all sorts of rumours about me, and even went back to people I knew from my old school and told them I had no friends there :\ this girl will do her best to hang on to you and backstab you all the way, get rid of her....good luck :(

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  • XJayX
    13 years ago

    She sounds like a horrible, self-absorbed, and completley fake person. Try to break away from her. She's not your best friend if she purposefully tries to ruin things that she knows you care about.

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  • Drea
    14 years ago

    I have come across people like this. They are miserable and cannot stand to see others happy. At times they pretend to be sweet & will bend over backwards for you, but if they feel jealous or unsure of you in anyway, they are likely to backstab you. It seems you have have become somewhat dependent to her. You hate her but can't get away from her. I suggest you analyze what is important to you & what you want in your life. This so called best friend of yours is bad news. I have seen some pretty bad things with people like this. If you really want to salvage the friendship then confront her on her actions. Personally I would remove her from my life.

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  • mtnw
    14 years ago

    same thing happened to me. it happened just like rob said, turned it all around and blamed everything on me. life is so much better without this so called friend.

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  • rob_asaad
    14 years ago

    "I dont know if i should tell her everything that has been bothering me in high school before we room together. or just not say anything and slowly break away from her and make my own friends."

    Sometimes the latter part is the best thing to do. I'm trying to do it right now with a former best friend. Selfish people don't like to be criticized...and will turn it around on you instead.

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  • shelbyshock
    14 years ago

    I had a friend just like that all through high school, up to my senior year. Pretty much everything you said described her perfectly. After years of it, I decided I didn't need someone like that in my life. So I slowly stopped talking to her and hanging out with her so much. It's a fantastic life without her!

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  • michellekiersten
    10 years ago

    She doesn't sound like a friend at all. I recently stopped being friends with my bestfriend. The best way to do it is stop talking to her so much. Stop hanging out with her. Soon, you'll be complete strangers and she'll be attached to someone else

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  • DameInDistress
    11 years ago

    Break off the friendship. Hun, she's going to bring you down, I don't know you personally, but I can tell from your words that she is breaking you down. And if something is breaking you DOWN, break it OFF. Hope I helped. =)

    N. x

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  • alv1592
    13 years ago

    why do you hangout w/ her? really, if you hate someone, they're not your friend. no matter how well you know her, she's not your friend if you don't like each other.

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  • eviltwinn
    13 years ago

    I think there are several reasons why you still hang with her... You could be:

    a. friendless, and she would be the only one willing to stick around.

    b. have some kind of self loathing issue. maybe you just like the drama, or the competition rather... to make yourself feel better.

    c. just plain dumb. and you said this yourself. you hate your best friend's guts? you're rooming with her in college? she's obviously not your best friend if you hate her so much.

    d. all of the above.

    My advice, tell her how you feel. If she truly wants to be your friend after you've told her your feelings, then she's worth keeping a friend. If not, take a dose and stop asking dumb questions.

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  • Konungr
    13 years ago

    Do you like her at all? Did you used to like her? If not then just don't hang out with her, request a different room in college and just ignore her, if you ignore her long enough her need for attention will make her make attach to someone else and forget about you.

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  • lmn
    14 years ago

    Why is she you best friend? I think you need to seriously ask yourself this question Life is too short to invest this much into people that don't bring any good to your life. Tell her to get lost.

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  • psychobabble
    14 years ago

    She has self-esteem issues and she probably wishes she could be more like you. I know it's annoying but try to take it as a compliment. Maybe try talking to her about it.

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