Is it normal that he didn't make the move?

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15 Comments

I have been dating a guy for almost 2 months. We've been seeing each other twice a week or so. I have been single for over a year and he knows that. I've been to his place twice. The first time when I was at his place, when he asked me if I wanted to go to his room I said no. We just made out.... But last night, I was ready.... I wanted to have sex. After a while of kissing on the couch he asked me if I wanted to go to his room, I said yes. We kissed for hours, we were fully clothed the whole time. He once said "I want you bad" but he didn't try to take my clothes off or anything. Is this normal? Was he expecting me to ask for sex? I don't get it?

I know he really really likes me. I like him too. But why didn't he make the move? He has no confidence or shyness issues by the way.

Is this normal?

Should I tell him that I wanted to have sex last night or should I just leave it unsaid?

We are both 30 by the way.

Is It Normal?
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Comments ( 15 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • Arm0se
    8 years ago | pl

    You need to make the first move

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  • charli.m
    8 years ago | pl

    Maybe he's waiting for a signal from you? How would we know? We don't have access to his thoughts.

    Why does he have to make the first move, anyway?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      8 years ago | pl

      I have only been in one relationship (long one) before him, and have never been in this situation before....

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      • charli.m
        8 years ago | pl

        Ok. Still doesn't mean he has to make the first move, still means you sshould talk to him about it.

        If you can't talk openly with someone you're wanting to have sex with, you probably shouldn't be having sex with them.

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  • NeuroNeptunian
    8 years ago | pl

    You need to make the first move. I'm not trying to get gender-y here or anything but considering the huge thing we have going on, socially, about what does and doesn't quantify as rape (obviously, consent = consensual but some people seriously do see "pressured sex" as rape), he's likely playing it really safe. Verbally consent. Tell him that you want to fuck him. Explicitly. Don't leave shit to the imagination.

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  • Gspyder
    8 years ago | pl

    Sounds like he wanted to hear you say you wanted it or something. Idk, I would have considered you going to his room as a green light and gone for it.

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  • zsdworknman
    8 years ago | pl

    It's pretty damn hot when a girl just reaches down and grabs my cock when we r making out. Don't be shy

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  • tripw7
    8 years ago | pl

    You can tell him that you are ready anytime he is. He will understand.

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  • Leah992
    8 years ago | pl

    maybe he was waiting for you to take your own clothes off

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  • Qwertyzxc
    8 years ago | pl

    Could it be that he was too tired?

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  • mystery7
    8 years ago | pl

    Why don't you just talk to him about it instead of keeping you both guessing? You are both adults.
    It could even be that he wants clear consent from you, as these days guys especially can be wary of not progressing too fast in case a girl decides after the fact that she did not consent to having sex.

    Other than that it's possible he's embarrassed about being nude or letting you see his equipment?

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  • Phat
    8 years ago | pl

    Grow a set of tits. Next time your wanting dick reach down and shove your hand down his pants and check out the goods. Quit pussy footing around. If your faggit ass boyfriend rejects the advance go find yourself another dumbass there's plenty where he came from. I would have dumped your ass after the third date if I didn't at least get oral from you. Are you two dumb asses 15 or what? Wtf!

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  • Lonely2
    8 years ago | pl

    There are actually times I am not that horny ....this can caused by the person I am with or just my own internal libido....sometimes as a guy we dont want to be seen as too aggressive because we think the girl will think we just want them for sex.....and then there are times when signals are uncertain.....if you were sitting on his bed thats a pretty good cue......some guys are also sexually passive..in other words they get turned on by you making the moves...so it all depends

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  • green_boogers
    8 years ago | pl

    Ask him if it would be OK for you to undress him. Many men are accepting of sexually aggressive women.

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