Is it normal sometimes wanting to murder people?

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Sometimes, when I'm in the right mood, I start emotionally experiencing extreme hatred towards everything/everyone. I cannot calm down/find peace before I've imagined myself killing/hurting people in the most brutal and disturbing ways I can think of. Problem is, it feels like I really want to do it. If I actually had some sort of weapon near me while in this mood, I might actually go out and do it to someone. Afterwards, when I've thought about it enough, I always calm down, and I feel horrible about myself thinking like this/wanting to do this for a short period of time, and I realize that I really don't want this to happen/that it is pointless. From then on I go on feeling sad, depressed, and sometimes nearly suicidal (mostly because i hate myself for thinking like this, even if it`s for a short period of time), for a short period of time, before I return to normal. Usually I don`t have any sort of hatred towards people, and I always try to be nice and understanding, but sometimes my brain just kind of snaps, randomly, and I get these extreme, random feelings/thoughts. Is it normal to get these sort of episodes?

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Comments ( 5 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • dappled
    11 years ago | pl

    Whenever I see the word "hate" in an IIN post, I always wonder what is actually going on and if the OP genuinely feels hate for humanity or whether it's some process going on inside themselves that they don't have awareness enough to describe or identify yet. Anger, self-loathing, insecurity, disenfranchisement, loneliness, jealousy. All powerful things. When people say "hate", I wonder whether they mean one (or a combination) of the aforementioned. If so and you know which they are, then good, because it brings you one step closer to yourself.

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  • Possible_Psycho
    7 years ago | pl

    i have had the exact same thing, except i didn't feel bad afterwards, i just went on...

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  • zpl
    11 years ago | pl

    I'm pretty much the same except that I find it much easier to control myself, though I wouldn't mind if they just died horribly without me interfering. Other than that I'm the most peaceful guy you could find, which makes it weird. Music actually might make me love everyone, listening to it may be a good idea.

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  • aussiewolf
    11 years ago | pl

    sounds like you need to talk to a professional.

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  • Failedcasanova
    11 years ago | pl

    I've been exactly where you are. I've found that learning to control my temper and practicing relation exercises helps.

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