Sounds like your bf acted like a great big weenie but also had his own frustrations - not to excuse him, but not to condemn either. You seem pretty self aware and maybe could look into help around some of the overwhelming fears/anxiety and how to address that. That affects your quality of life/relationships. You may want to think more about what kind of bf would best suit you too. I don't think assigning blame matters here (not that you are) it is more like what you can learn.
Is it normal my anxiety scared my boyfriend away?
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Sounds like your bf acted like a great big weenie but also had his own frustrations - not to excuse him, but not to condemn either. You seem pretty self aware and maybe could look into help around some of the overwhelming fears/anxiety and how to address that. That affects your quality of life/relationships. You may want to think more about what kind of bf would best suit you too. I don't think assigning blame matters here (not that you are) it is more like what you can learn.