No, shaming people for considering suicide would not help. When I was suicidal, I had friends who tried to help by telling me how hurt everybody would be and how selfish it would be to commit suicide, and it just made me feel much, much worse, which made me want to kill myself more. When people consider suicide, they're not trying to hurt people, and they're not necessarily unaware of how hurt people might be. They're just in too much pain to make that their first priority.
Depression is an illness. It makes it difficult to do anything, and when it got really bad for me, I forgot what it was like to be happy. Occasionally I'd feel a bit better for a short time, but often, every emotion that I should've been feeling was replaced by pain and guilt. I didn't decide to start considering suicide, it just happened. To me, my suicidal thoughts felt involuntary, like an obsession that came out of nowhere. When people commit suicide, it does hurt people, but I don't think it's selfish, exactly. People commit suicide because they don't know what else to do, and because they've run out of energy to try to get better anymore. Sometimes they've been depressed for years, with no reason to believe it will ever get better. The most important thing to understand, I think, is that suicide is the result of mental illness, which can affect people's judgement.
It's worth noting, also, that people who commit suicide sometimes have mental (and sometimes physical) illnesses other than depression. People with schizophrenia are at particularly high risk for suicide, as are people with anorexia or bulimia. Chronic pain, which can trigger or worsen depression, is also sometimes a factor.
Thoughts are just words in your head (although some people speak of "visual thoughts" I think that's splitting hairs and we should stick to calling that "imagination"). You have a choice about whether or not to follow them. I see you've made the right choice.
You have a choice whether or not to follow them, yes, but depression can cloud your judgement in ways you can't really control. I'm not saying that it's impossible for some people not to commit suicide, I'm saying that it can be very difficult. Not everybody is always in a position where they can do very difficult things.
I experienced depression that was probably worse than some people who kill themselves. But I was also very afraid of death, of nothingness. I preferred misery to nothingness. At least misery is an experience, at least it's something.
And even if there's something after death it's a complete unknown, why would I want such a major change and throw my life or rather my experience of things into total chaos?
IIN If I Have No Sympathy For People Who Commit Suicide
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No, shaming people for considering suicide would not help. When I was suicidal, I had friends who tried to help by telling me how hurt everybody would be and how selfish it would be to commit suicide, and it just made me feel much, much worse, which made me want to kill myself more. When people consider suicide, they're not trying to hurt people, and they're not necessarily unaware of how hurt people might be. They're just in too much pain to make that their first priority.
Depression is an illness. It makes it difficult to do anything, and when it got really bad for me, I forgot what it was like to be happy. Occasionally I'd feel a bit better for a short time, but often, every emotion that I should've been feeling was replaced by pain and guilt. I didn't decide to start considering suicide, it just happened. To me, my suicidal thoughts felt involuntary, like an obsession that came out of nowhere. When people commit suicide, it does hurt people, but I don't think it's selfish, exactly. People commit suicide because they don't know what else to do, and because they've run out of energy to try to get better anymore. Sometimes they've been depressed for years, with no reason to believe it will ever get better. The most important thing to understand, I think, is that suicide is the result of mental illness, which can affect people's judgement.
It's worth noting, also, that people who commit suicide sometimes have mental (and sometimes physical) illnesses other than depression. People with schizophrenia are at particularly high risk for suicide, as are people with anorexia or bulimia. Chronic pain, which can trigger or worsen depression, is also sometimes a factor.
I hope that helps explain depression and suicide.
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Geldsmaggen
11 years ago
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"suicidal thoughts felt involuntary"
Thoughts are just words in your head (although some people speak of "visual thoughts" I think that's splitting hairs and we should stick to calling that "imagination"). You have a choice about whether or not to follow them. I see you've made the right choice.
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VioletTrees
11 years ago
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You have a choice whether or not to follow them, yes, but depression can cloud your judgement in ways you can't really control. I'm not saying that it's impossible for some people not to commit suicide, I'm saying that it can be very difficult. Not everybody is always in a position where they can do very difficult things.
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Geldsmaggen
10 years ago
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I experienced depression that was probably worse than some people who kill themselves. But I was also very afraid of death, of nothingness. I preferred misery to nothingness. At least misery is an experience, at least it's something.
And even if there's something after death it's a complete unknown, why would I want such a major change and throw my life or rather my experience of things into total chaos?