But so do you believe it's okay to see him, be with him, have sex with him, without being in an actual relationship?
Of course I dont want to be taken advantage of but thats where my point is in this post. It's up to him to respect me. And so, I feel like doing all those things with him even tho we're not officially together. Once I realize hes taking advantage of me then thats when I walk away. I'm not going to hold myself back. It's up to him to respect me and be an adult about it.
Personally, I wouldn't take such an arrangement like this seriously, and probably only see it as a means to have convenient sex without feeling tied down.
However, despite my own opinion, the fact is that there's absolutely nothing wrong with friends with benefits. It can have truly wonderful endings with couples getting married, or horrible ones where no one is happy. It's a risk like every other relationship out there, but if you're aware of the consequences and have a plan if problems were to present itself, then you're good. You're being smart about it, and that's what really matters.
Okay plus I don't plan on having sex casually, but if it happens then it happens. If I can stop myself, then great. At the end of the day, my hope is for him to gain respect for me and want to be with me again. The last thing I want is for him to think he can have me without committing later. The thing is I feel like if I hold back on having sex with him, or be more vulnerable in any way, he's going to go look for it somewhere else. But at the same time, if he is worth my time, then he wouldn't go somewhere else. Got it.
Is it normal if I don't know or like having boundaries?
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Great explanation!
But so do you believe it's okay to see him, be with him, have sex with him, without being in an actual relationship?
Of course I dont want to be taken advantage of but thats where my point is in this post. It's up to him to respect me. And so, I feel like doing all those things with him even tho we're not officially together. Once I realize hes taking advantage of me then thats when I walk away. I'm not going to hold myself back. It's up to him to respect me and be an adult about it.
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Tealights
7 years ago
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Personally, I wouldn't take such an arrangement like this seriously, and probably only see it as a means to have convenient sex without feeling tied down.
However, despite my own opinion, the fact is that there's absolutely nothing wrong with friends with benefits. It can have truly wonderful endings with couples getting married, or horrible ones where no one is happy. It's a risk like every other relationship out there, but if you're aware of the consequences and have a plan if problems were to present itself, then you're good. You're being smart about it, and that's what really matters.
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Anonymous Post Author
7 years ago
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Okay plus I don't plan on having sex casually, but if it happens then it happens. If I can stop myself, then great. At the end of the day, my hope is for him to gain respect for me and want to be with me again. The last thing I want is for him to think he can have me without committing later. The thing is I feel like if I hold back on having sex with him, or be more vulnerable in any way, he's going to go look for it somewhere else. But at the same time, if he is worth my time, then he wouldn't go somewhere else. Got it.