Most of us are purely bottoms, (meaning we take dicks not give it) and the chances of meeting a trans women is actually pretty likly. You've probably already met one, for example the other day i was washing my hands after a quick tinkle at work sone guy walks into the bathroom and gives me this horrified look and you can easily read his thoughts of oh shit im in the wrong bathroom, i got put of there fast, way to embarrassing(I live as a woman full time and am passable to most but since my legal name is still a boys name so far ive been unable to convince my job to respect my desire for a proper nane tag so yea still gotta use the men's room and get called Anthony every day (bugs the shit out of me) but in the end I've made one last request for it to be changed and if not I'll work elsewhere witg better pay. If I'm gonna get called that disgusting name I want to warn better than min wage. Fortunately I'm our only full timr cashier as we are severely understaffed so i have leverage!
Not of me to tell adults what to do but if I may -
Maybe avoid sharing your male name if you do not legally have to share it. You are not that guy anymore, you are (your female name). Besides, for the same reason some calls us "Sir" knowing good and well that is no longer who we are, but they may use it against you.
I do not know where you live but where I am, 8 years ago I spent $300 to legally change my name. About $130 court cost, $130 to have it announced in a "local circulating newspaper" $20 for a new ID, and another $20 for other small costs like having my name change docs notarized, parking at the govt building...
In the mean time maybe you could get a name tag that says "Toni" since the name is synonymous but feminized version of your present name, even if Toni isn't exactly what you want but still an improvement.
It is indeed, im really pushing the issue with my boss. Was even able yo get him to cough up a 75cent raise. He's having a meeting soon with other managers about my name and I know them well enough tgere all for it. I told him I was looking at other places and he immediatly got serious and was like don't. We need you here don't want to loose you. (I'm good worker and were understaffed I'm not great but im good) so that's nice! But yea i dont tell anyone my male name. I fully love by Sarah, i would avsoloutly change by mane but i need to be a resident of Michigan for a year and back when I lived in North dakota I wasn't ready to fave a judge yet.
Oh yea those people are dicks! Screw them. Wonder how many are gonna be jerks to me cause we have our regulars and so far ive been purely a cashier. Can't wait to take over apparel get away from people
A couple things - Yeah i think being a resident of a state for one year is a requirement but also if someone has certain felonies, getting a name change might be more of a challenge. I doubt you have any but just something to consider IF you have had legal troubles.
About the boss not wanting you to leave - Attendance seems to be an ongoing problem in a lot of workplaces. If someone even shows up to work each shift, they are pretty much golden.
With the boss's resistance - I had a similar situation in beauty school. Was living full time but had not changed my legal name yet. I wanted a name tag with my new name. They would not do it. Their reason was - "then everyone would want a new name tag with a "nick name". I instantly got this image of 50 young women running around with the name tag saying "Baby Girl" (every single young woman in the early 2010's called themselves that)
Oh god no! My record is squeaky clean! I enjoy weapons that require licenses so i have no interest in doing something go fuck that up for myself. Seriously? I've never had tgat problem in any of my past jobs!
But yea i mean occasionally I'm late but its only ever a few minutes, professionalism is very important. Some people are a joke.
Jesus Christ thst sounds awful. I can understand that one a but though, not saying it makes it right. My manager (changing names for his and her privacy) linda gave me a new tag ladt night with my choosen name on. She was like hey Bill thos is getting rodiculos she constantly hides that name tag when dealing with guests it's time for a new one and he was like yea.. have you spoken to the others how they feel? She's lile they are all supportive or simply don't care. Him yea fine I suppose. (She told me about it. She even thought I would get offended, she's woefully uneducated it's adorable) but yea do that's all done! Twisted my bosses arm and got whst I deserved haha. He finally officially offered me to take over apparel. Unfortunatly for him in thinking about getting a second full time job wich would be a grand more than apparel would give. Still deciding though. 16 hour days..
If you take this other job, just of course try to find out ahead of time how they are towards transgender employees, what might go well and what challenges might arise.
I would still encourage you to work towards the legal name change soon. Once it is legal, people have no choice but to recognize.
I do not know how long it would take for sure but IIRC it was three months from the time i filed until my court date where it became legal.
I don't think I've ever met a trans person since I live in the Balkans area where even gays (if I may) aren't quite fully accepted. The situation is not as extreme as it is in Russia but again there still exists a stigma against homosexuals. The younger generations (such as myself) are tolerant and supportive but again you can find some (quite a few) exceptions.
Also, the whole bathroom debacle is pure nonesense to me. Trans folks should be able to use whichever bathroom they feel comfortable using.
Well that's were most the issues occur. I dont give a shit a shit wich bathroom I use as long as i can use one i mean it's just a tpilet and washing facilities. It's being referred to by my old boy nane thst irks me, besudes my work boots and pants I dont even own any boy clothes, not even socks so it's like I shouldn't be being called a boys name when im not even hiding as one anymore, there's alot of discrimination here as well especially from older folks, probs better than over there though, the haha do have it pretty easy
It’s so stupid that they won’t call you by what you want to be called. It doesn’t hurt them at all to give you that respect. And the whole bathroom issue makes no sense to me. I’d rather have a trans girl be in the girls bathroom cause that’s more comfortable for them
That's the thing my coworkers don't care, it's my bloody fricken boss, the first time I applied they turned me down cause the position was taken(they were almost desperate for people and I have glowing references so makes one think it's cause I'm trabs) then they became desperate for people and suddenly I'm hireable, my boss is a prude•_• coworkers are cool though they can't respect it at work cause of my name tag, be unprofessional in front of the customers. Aye! It is! Plus every guy who enters the male one when im there gives me this weird look and then the realization sets and it stings. Not good for my mental health to be called by my old name. And i can't change it till I've been a resident for a year and I'm not a resident of this state yet and it's frustrsting! Haha ohwells I guess. Store across the street has better pay and will probs respect it. There boss is cool. If I dont get a raise and my name respected soon I'll leave for sure.
IIN I wouldn't mind sucking a trans girl off
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Most of us are purely bottoms, (meaning we take dicks not give it) and the chances of meeting a trans women is actually pretty likly. You've probably already met one, for example the other day i was washing my hands after a quick tinkle at work sone guy walks into the bathroom and gives me this horrified look and you can easily read his thoughts of oh shit im in the wrong bathroom, i got put of there fast, way to embarrassing(I live as a woman full time and am passable to most but since my legal name is still a boys name so far ive been unable to convince my job to respect my desire for a proper nane tag so yea still gotta use the men's room and get called Anthony every day (bugs the shit out of me) but in the end I've made one last request for it to be changed and if not I'll work elsewhere witg better pay. If I'm gonna get called that disgusting name I want to warn better than min wage. Fortunately I'm our only full timr cashier as we are severely understaffed so i have leverage!
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Not of me to tell adults what to do but if I may -
Maybe avoid sharing your male name if you do not legally have to share it. You are not that guy anymore, you are (your female name). Besides, for the same reason some calls us "Sir" knowing good and well that is no longer who we are, but they may use it against you.
I do not know where you live but where I am, 8 years ago I spent $300 to legally change my name. About $130 court cost, $130 to have it announced in a "local circulating newspaper" $20 for a new ID, and another $20 for other small costs like having my name change docs notarized, parking at the govt building...
In the mean time maybe you could get a name tag that says "Toni" since the name is synonymous but feminized version of your present name, even if Toni isn't exactly what you want but still an improvement.
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It is indeed, im really pushing the issue with my boss. Was even able yo get him to cough up a 75cent raise. He's having a meeting soon with other managers about my name and I know them well enough tgere all for it. I told him I was looking at other places and he immediatly got serious and was like don't. We need you here don't want to loose you. (I'm good worker and were understaffed I'm not great but im good) so that's nice! But yea i dont tell anyone my male name. I fully love by Sarah, i would avsoloutly change by mane but i need to be a resident of Michigan for a year and back when I lived in North dakota I wasn't ready to fave a judge yet.
Oh yea those people are dicks! Screw them. Wonder how many are gonna be jerks to me cause we have our regulars and so far ive been purely a cashier. Can't wait to take over apparel get away from people
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leggs91200
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A couple things - Yeah i think being a resident of a state for one year is a requirement but also if someone has certain felonies, getting a name change might be more of a challenge. I doubt you have any but just something to consider IF you have had legal troubles.
About the boss not wanting you to leave - Attendance seems to be an ongoing problem in a lot of workplaces. If someone even shows up to work each shift, they are pretty much golden.
With the boss's resistance - I had a similar situation in beauty school. Was living full time but had not changed my legal name yet. I wanted a name tag with my new name. They would not do it. Their reason was - "then everyone would want a new name tag with a "nick name". I instantly got this image of 50 young women running around with the name tag saying "Baby Girl" (every single young woman in the early 2010's called themselves that)
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Oh god no! My record is squeaky clean! I enjoy weapons that require licenses so i have no interest in doing something go fuck that up for myself. Seriously? I've never had tgat problem in any of my past jobs!
But yea i mean occasionally I'm late but its only ever a few minutes, professionalism is very important. Some people are a joke.
Jesus Christ thst sounds awful. I can understand that one a but though, not saying it makes it right. My manager (changing names for his and her privacy) linda gave me a new tag ladt night with my choosen name on. She was like hey Bill thos is getting rodiculos she constantly hides that name tag when dealing with guests it's time for a new one and he was like yea.. have you spoken to the others how they feel? She's lile they are all supportive or simply don't care. Him yea fine I suppose. (She told me about it. She even thought I would get offended, she's woefully uneducated it's adorable) but yea do that's all done! Twisted my bosses arm and got whst I deserved haha. He finally officially offered me to take over apparel. Unfortunatly for him in thinking about getting a second full time job wich would be a grand more than apparel would give. Still deciding though. 16 hour days..
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leggs91200
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If you take this other job, just of course try to find out ahead of time how they are towards transgender employees, what might go well and what challenges might arise.
I would still encourage you to work towards the legal name change soon. Once it is legal, people have no choice but to recognize.
I do not know how long it would take for sure but IIRC it was three months from the time i filed until my court date where it became legal.
I don't think I've ever met a trans person since I live in the Balkans area where even gays (if I may) aren't quite fully accepted. The situation is not as extreme as it is in Russia but again there still exists a stigma against homosexuals. The younger generations (such as myself) are tolerant and supportive but again you can find some (quite a few) exceptions.
Also, the whole bathroom debacle is pure nonesense to me. Trans folks should be able to use whichever bathroom they feel comfortable using.
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Well that's were most the issues occur. I dont give a shit a shit wich bathroom I use as long as i can use one i mean it's just a tpilet and washing facilities. It's being referred to by my old boy nane thst irks me, besudes my work boots and pants I dont even own any boy clothes, not even socks so it's like I shouldn't be being called a boys name when im not even hiding as one anymore, there's alot of discrimination here as well especially from older folks, probs better than over there though, the haha do have it pretty easy
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That's also the thing, I don't get why it's so hard for people to respect others' pronouns.
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curious-bunny
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Yea its fucked up man. It's emotionally stressful
It’s so stupid that they won’t call you by what you want to be called. It doesn’t hurt them at all to give you that respect. And the whole bathroom issue makes no sense to me. I’d rather have a trans girl be in the girls bathroom cause that’s more comfortable for them
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That's the thing my coworkers don't care, it's my bloody fricken boss, the first time I applied they turned me down cause the position was taken(they were almost desperate for people and I have glowing references so makes one think it's cause I'm trabs) then they became desperate for people and suddenly I'm hireable, my boss is a prude•_• coworkers are cool though they can't respect it at work cause of my name tag, be unprofessional in front of the customers. Aye! It is! Plus every guy who enters the male one when im there gives me this weird look and then the realization sets and it stings. Not good for my mental health to be called by my old name. And i can't change it till I've been a resident for a year and I'm not a resident of this state yet and it's frustrsting! Haha ohwells I guess. Store across the street has better pay and will probs respect it. There boss is cool. If I dont get a raise and my name respected soon I'll leave for sure.