IIN I want to go to a trashy wedding?

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  • Yesssss

    Worst one I've seen was a remarriage. It was in a church basement with a drop ceiling. Bride's dementia mom kept eating nuts and spitting chewed nut particles everywhere because there was no food to speak of. Speeches were so Scott's tots level cringy. Lots of jokes about being here again & I hope this one lasts. Drunk guy was trying to clink a glass to get the newlyweds to kiss. It shattered all over the floor & he didn't tell anyone. Shoeless bride walked in the broken glass.

    It was fucking amazing.

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    • Ha, ha. I bet people would pay to see that as a performance.

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    • Just the kind of trash I was hoping would wash up on this post.

      In terms of cringe the wedding I mentioned included the wasted mother of the bride laying hands on my Dad thinking it would cure him of his frozen shoulder.

      In another one the officiant went on a long monologue about how hard marriage is with her husband, the registrar, sitting right next to her. Once the couple were married my mother loudly exclaimed “They’ve only got one copy of the wedding certificate!” and grabbed the shoulder of my engaged cousin in the row in-front of us (who we’ve met about 3 times) and fiercely instructed him to get “TWO COPIES” at his own wedding “JUST INCASE”. It was so awkward.

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      • The only thing better than drunk trash is drunk trash convinced they'll be together forever.

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