Hmmm, I recently had a similar problem. My thoughts were "ditch them before they leave" "without friends, there's no loss to be made". I've just lost all my friends... I regret it. Don't deliberately make friends, but don't push them away, unless they aren't good friends for you. I'm also a loner by nature, but each time you push everyone away, what truly hurts isn't the loss, it's the lack. What i'm trying to say is, when you loose someone there's a gap there, and the gap hurts, not the loss as much.
Sure, if you never fill the gap, your heart will shrink around it, an it will be a smaller duller pain, but trust me, that isn't good. It's nearly impossible to reverse, and that pain will occasionally spike up, almost killing you, tearing you to shreds.
It's worth trying to keep people close. The loss hurts, but so does the lacking.
As for leaving your husband, you'll be hurt when he dies, no matter if you're together or not. Enjoy the together, deal with the loss, friends soften the blow of pain, and doing so brings you closer. And smile more! It's good for you! =)
Remember this, it's something my friend once told me, and it's always stuck in my mind: "No-one want to be alone. I don't care what anyone says."
Is it normal I want to be alone to avoid being hurt?
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Hmmm, I recently had a similar problem. My thoughts were "ditch them before they leave" "without friends, there's no loss to be made". I've just lost all my friends... I regret it. Don't deliberately make friends, but don't push them away, unless they aren't good friends for you. I'm also a loner by nature, but each time you push everyone away, what truly hurts isn't the loss, it's the lack. What i'm trying to say is, when you loose someone there's a gap there, and the gap hurts, not the loss as much.
Sure, if you never fill the gap, your heart will shrink around it, an it will be a smaller duller pain, but trust me, that isn't good. It's nearly impossible to reverse, and that pain will occasionally spike up, almost killing you, tearing you to shreds.
It's worth trying to keep people close. The loss hurts, but so does the lacking.
As for leaving your husband, you'll be hurt when he dies, no matter if you're together or not. Enjoy the together, deal with the loss, friends soften the blow of pain, and doing so brings you closer. And smile more! It's good for you! =)
Remember this, it's something my friend once told me, and it's always stuck in my mind: "No-one want to be alone. I don't care what anyone says."