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Okay, I know that's normal. But sometimes when I get really embarrassed or feel very anxious/panic-ridden, I say out loud "I want to die" or "I hate myself." It's not even that I think this on a normal basis, but I just say it when my mind is racing with thoughts. It's my worse fear to have someone hear me say it.
OMG I do EXACTLY the same thing. When I get racing thoughts especially from being embarrassed, remembering something social that I don't like to remember, think of things that I didn't do well, or anything anxious, I say out loud, "I hate myself" or "I want to die" or "kill me" or "I'm gonna kill you" about myself. It stops the thought process I think. It stops my mind from racing into a whirlpool. It's some kind of defense mechanism.
I'd love for you to inbox me or whatever people do on this site.
sorry, i meant to say, i know it's relatively normal to talk to yourself to remind yourself of things, or talk about what you need to do for the day. i meant to add, i *don't* think it's normal when you're saying things like "i just want to die" really fast or "i hate myself" or "i hate my life"......