Is it normal i really want this

Im just going to jump right in: im a 23 year old female.. always been abit weird lol- as in, for me to have get off mulitple times there has to be a slight tiny n i mean tiny element of wrong/taboo/ whatever you wanna call it but now for as long as i can remember i keep having such a strong fantasy.. before, i could picture me n my bf doing stuff blah de blah but not like this, i cant concentrate, it feels like the worst craving iv ever had and its sooo odd to me. Okay so its the black of night n im asleep maybe stirring, i feel a hand squeeze over my mouth n open my eyes shocked.. unable to scream even if i wanted to, im told to sit up n slowly get out of bed n no screaming- i obey.
I cant see a thing n the "stranger" is behind me pressing against my nakedness, hands all over me but soo gentle.. starts telling me things only a stalker would know, he uses a high standard of vocabulary for sadistic romancing but hes still being so gentle n caring in touch---> skipping quite abit prob bit boring being long lol, sorry----> im so ready for him but still i give off reluctance, exactly whats he wants, tells me to get on all fours.. collar n leashes me then makes me crawl around a little, leading me..but only so he can watch me.. I show disproval, he spanks me like i deserve ----> no point saying the rest coz theres the odd bit! I want my bf to put a collar n lead on me and possibly slightly treat me like a dog/pet... is that normal? Or okay by todays standards? lol if so how would i go about presenting the idea to my bf.. last but no means least if someone understands why im so stuck on it could you maybe explain to me?