Is it normal i like people who makes me mad?

Okay so I don't like people who annoy me but certain people I do like because they make me fired up.
I am usually very surpressed, afraid of confrontation, shy and can come off as quite innocent due to this. Therefore the friends that I have are very sweet and kind people whom i've never needed to have a single argument with. Many men I date think they need to be super careful with me, except the ones who's tried to manipulate me.

Thing is though i'm not actually all that nice, I just have anxiety, and i'm not afraid to set boundries even if I prefer to do it in text. I say no to people often and I don't care how they feel about it, I will never do anything i'm not comfortable with. If someone i'm dating tries to manipulate me I either turn his little game against him or just cut him off immadiately. It's starting to get fun because they always get so shocked and never expected it.

But I don't like to fight or argue so when I meet someone who's quite ironic (because my friends are such sweet people and they hardly ever use humor which isn't nice) and who dare to say anything they want to and around me without caring that I seem innocent I like them and actually respect them and if they say something that offends me I am not afraid to bicker with them because i'm not afraid to hurt the feelings of such people so I just be myself. Like when the honeymoon phase between me and my ex wore off and he stopped being so sweet all the time and we actually started to argue, i've never been more comfortable with someone. It was great. I didn't start the arguments though obviously due to anxiety, but he was the type of guy who would start arguments over nothing just for the sake of it sometimes but I didn't mind much.

Is this normal? I just like people who force me to be the bitch I never otherwise am sometimes.

Is It Normal?
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Comments ( 6 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • Maybe you like it because it gets you out of your shell, and you feel strong enough to say what you feel.

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    • Yeah that's a good way of putting it

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  • Do you mean more of an argument or more of a debate? 'Cause I love to debate topics, it gets me out of my shell too, that's why I find it interesting.

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  • BTW pretty sure I could easily pick out the other post that you wrote and I responded to recently. People didn't vote for "normal" there either but that is because you are one of the special ones who is misunderstood by most people. You are likely an introvert and highly sensitive and intuitive. I wish more people were as you described yourself but it will never be. Like you, I cannot be manipulated so I totally get it, all of it.

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  • Seriously healthy outlook and way to be in my opinion. Now consider it possible that some of what you are calling "arguments" are actually "debates" even if somewhat heated. So even if you get mad and become a bitch, I can't imagine that you find yourself always being right... So in effect this all winds up being a form of communication, learning, and mutual understanding. The only time this game gets crappy is if you become covert-aggressive just because it's fun.

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  • To have a successful marriage or relationship you have to learn how to argue and how to let a persom vent.

    Example: My wife would not use her screen protector on her phone. I told her to use it many times. I come home one day and her phone is on the counter with a broken screen. I dont say a word. Because as soon as I do she's gonna get mad and say something like "I knew you'd be happy to say I told you so!".

    You gotta know when to stfu and your partner has to know when to stfu. If he's stressed out and he tells you to stop clicking your pen, don't say "Nooo its my pen you dont need to be mad". Just stop clicking your pen then when you get mad he should let you vent too. When he's mad cut him a break and when you're mad he should cut you a break.

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