My best guess would be that some part of you connects very strongly with images and stories from the Civil War period. It's normal to become attached to things like this - it happens to people with books, movies, countries (we all know someone obsessed with Japan!), time periods, and so on and so forth.
There could also be a somewhat latent desire for escape from reality there as well. Escapism is a very common theme among people, and while it doesn't necessarily mean there's anything "wrong" or "abnormal" with you, excessive reliance on escapism can be detrimental to your life.
I would personally suggest taking some time to think about what the images you see of the Civil War mean to you.
You mention fear of death when called upon to fight. A lot of people fear not living up to expectations, be they their own or others. You also mention your parents remorse upon hearing about your death. A lot of people want to feel reassured that their parents care about them. Perhaps the mentioning of both of these things together could indicate a part of you that feels worried about not living up to your parents expectations, and wanting to know that even if you didn't, they would still care about you and love you?
Only you know the answers, and I think the best thing to do is start asking yourself the questions, or to see if you can find a counselor or therapist you get along with and like, and share these things with him or her.
Is it normal I have memories of fighting in the civil war?
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My best guess would be that some part of you connects very strongly with images and stories from the Civil War period. It's normal to become attached to things like this - it happens to people with books, movies, countries (we all know someone obsessed with Japan!), time periods, and so on and so forth.
There could also be a somewhat latent desire for escape from reality there as well. Escapism is a very common theme among people, and while it doesn't necessarily mean there's anything "wrong" or "abnormal" with you, excessive reliance on escapism can be detrimental to your life.
I would personally suggest taking some time to think about what the images you see of the Civil War mean to you.
You mention fear of death when called upon to fight. A lot of people fear not living up to expectations, be they their own or others. You also mention your parents remorse upon hearing about your death. A lot of people want to feel reassured that their parents care about them. Perhaps the mentioning of both of these things together could indicate a part of you that feels worried about not living up to your parents expectations, and wanting to know that even if you didn't, they would still care about you and love you?
Only you know the answers, and I think the best thing to do is start asking yourself the questions, or to see if you can find a counselor or therapist you get along with and like, and share these things with him or her.
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Captain_Kegstand
11 years ago
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Good answer! It actually applies to some of the "daydreams" in my life as well. lolz