Is it normal i feel sad about being a virgin?

I know this may seem like an overused question, but in my circumstances, I'm really starting to feel the weight of being a virgin at at a late age (I don't want to put my real age here) really weigh me down. In the course of my life I've had 2 girls so to speak. One I dated for about a month, and the other was about for 5 months. I know what its like to be with a girl, but I never really got to experience what every other person at my school has. It's just that lately, every kid at my school seems to be getting a lot of action in comparison to me. Today, I sat a table with 4 guys who are my age who have had sex and were sharing their experiences, and I felt like a complete loser because these guys are what you would call "nerdy" and "unattractive" and I'm fit. I don't have a big ego, but I go to the gym, and I wear nice clothes, but nothing is attracted to me. Even the kid who I really dislike, tells me about how much him and his girlfriend have had sex, and he's a complete loser, he has no friends in our school at all. I just feel like a complete loser, because kids are obviously at the mature age where they decide to have sex, but everyone is having it and I just feel like I'll never get the chance to experience it, and I know it's stupid but I honestly feel pretty upset about it. It's really hard knowing that guys who are less attractive than me are having more success, and I feel like I'm a nice and charming guy. It really solidified today in one of my classes, because there is this group of guys and girls who all fuck each other and just chat about it all the time, and I have to sit there and pretend like it doesn't make me feel insecure and less of a man. Just for side notes, my penis isn't a microdick or anything that makes me fearful of having sex, I just feel like I'll never get to experience it whilst everyone is having the time of their lives. Any help would be appreciated. I know most of you will say its normal, but I would appreciate legitimate responses on how I can handle my sanity right now.

Is It Normal?
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Comments ( 19 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • "at a late age"+ "school"!??? Bruh. You ain't even old enough to be out of school yet and your worrying about this?

    That is unless you went back to college at a late age, in which case get some new friends.

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    • I'm an immature kid who has a libido like everyone else, sometimes it's hard not to worry.

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      • So jerk off like everybody else!

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        • Hahaha. I do, but it's like eating the same food everyday, sometimes you want to try something different.

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  • The mistake you're making is allowing sex control your self-esteem.

    Build your confidence up, because if you're insecure and always worrying about where to stick your penis in, you're going to miss out of a great girl or end up getting some hoe pregnant.

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    • I definitely am. My confidence was high when I was in a relationship, but when it ended I could feel it go down instantly and I used to question what was wrong with my appearance and now I don't know where it's at. I definitely need a haircut, but as for speaking to girls, I have no issues there. I'm just a generally confused individual lately.

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  • dont worry dear,its normal.u r lucky that u r virgin.

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    • Thanks. It's one of those things that are based on interpretation, but I hope to lose it soon.

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  • Don't be depressed over not getting rid of your virginity yet. That time will arrive soon enough.

    The important thing to keep in mind:

    -You don't need a girlfriend to get rid of your virginity.

    -The female you have sex with should not be your last. Say thank you , and move on to other women. It's called "Dating".

    -Some women will want you to commit to her, to have sex. Don't do that.

    You mentioned you dated 2 girls, one for one month, the other for 5 months. .... You didn't date these girls. You were just hanging out with them. If you were really dating a girl, there would have been sexual activity. You would not be a virgin.

    In the future, when you go out with a girl, if nothing sexual happens within 3 times going out with her, say good bye. If there is no sexual interest for you by the 3rd time out with you, she isn't sexually attracted to you.

    So never waste a whole month, especially never waste 5 months ever again.

    Also, you do not have to date only one girl at a time. Date as many as you can. Don't seek relationships. Dating is for sex.

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    • I agree with you, but I also disagree. I can date a girl and show her love and affection without sexual contact, and I've done so before. She was super anti-sex (dunno what she is now) and I respected that. A relationship is built on that. But I've had my share of relationships and I've taken your advice and I'm starting to see more girls. I also feel bad because girls are at the age where they're young and don't understand what they want, but they're willing to commit alongside you. I'm never going to waste 5 months on someone again - disregarding the sex, because it was a toxic relationship. I'm not looking to sleep around and have sex with every girl in the world, I'm just looking to have fun and lose my childness.

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      • "Dating" = "Sex". That's why men invite women out. To have sex with her.

        Hanging out" = Whatever you want to express, love, affection, but it isn't sexual. You're only hanging out being friends.

        Relationships are based on sexual interaction. No sex, then no relationship. "Friendship"? Yes.

        These other girls, you're seeing, keeping you a nonsexual friend is in their benefit, not yours. So don't allow yourself to be friendzoned. Nothing more than just friendship will ever come of this.

        Try to avoid committed relationships. There is no benefit, for you, to have that. Look to have fun by dating as many women as you want.

        Older women don't always know what they want either because they committed too early, without enough experiences. Younger women have a biological agenda, usually, so you have to be careful to avoid that. They feel they have to be in a relationship to have sex, a kind of sense of security, hoping you will commit to her, then get married, but really this is not what you should do for sometime, if ever.

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  • no, theres no point in rushing sex just to say you had sex. just about everybody lies there ass off about having lots of sex in high school by the way.

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    • I know these guys aren't lying, but I feel as though I want to rush it. Then again, it's supposed to mean something. I'm caught in between.

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  • There is nothing to worry about, it's perfectly normal. Satisfied, probably not.

    Society needs to fucking stop pushing everything onto people and putting them under so much pressure with everything.

    Sex is not even a big deal even if people tend to present it that way.

    It's also ironic how guys are pressured to lose their virginity as fast as possible and sleep with many different girls while girls are supposed to protect their virginity until marriage or some shit like that.

    I'll soon be a 21 year old virgin who's never even been with someone let alone had any physical contact and I couldn't care less. It doesn't make a difference. I could understand if you felt lonely for not having a partner but being a virgin isn't a big deal.

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    • I'm glad there's someone that relates to me and doesn't let it control his life like it does to mine. I just want to fit in so badly, and it's the majoring "trend" at my school. I want to thank you for putting it into perspective, because I'm in my last year of school and I'm letting something stupid control me. If I wasn't in high-school, I probably wouldn't even care about it. I wish you the best.

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  • Don't let others experiences get you down. It'll happen when the times right, and it sounds like youre still young!!!
    Wouldn't you rather lose it and it mean something? Than just losing it for losing sake.
    Once its gone, its gone O;

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    • I would prefer that, but it's just bearing the stigma of being a virgin at my school that is somewhat unbearable, because it's almost the "social norm" to have constant sex at my age.

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      • So? be different and stand out ! do it when you want too not when others say you have too :)

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        • virginity is a state of mind you can't lose it just by having sex

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