Is it normal i feel guilty for my sexual attractions?

I've currently have been feeling a rollercoaster of emotions for something that happened to me today. One of my friends asked if I wanted to go out with him and I rejected him because I was already with someone else of whom he happened to know. He then called me out and said I was a self-hater because I've never been in a relationship with someone of my own ethnicity and I was brainwashed by the media.

I'm African American and I've only dated Caucasian men. 99% of the time I've found men who have a more huskier build to be attractive, including a hairy body, beards, bald/short hair, etc. I've been attracted to mostly men of all ethnicities (including my own) who fit that description. Although I tend to think these features look more attractive on those with lighter skin tone guys and even though darker skin tone turns me off (just like every other body type turns me off), I wouldn't rule out dating someone with said features if I found something else about them that would turn me on just because of their skin color or body type or whatever.

But what he said really bothered me and made me feel guilty about what I'm attracted...

Is It Normal?
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Comments ( 14 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • Sounds to me the rejected fellow is a pretty childish person. Kinda like the little boy who no one likes to play with who steals the ball and runs home. He also sounds like a loser and you would be better off not having anything to do with him.
    There is no need to feel guilt about who you are attracted to and it is certainly none of this jerk's business. Fuck him!

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  • Your "friend" is an asshole. He's not even worth your time. Forget that fool!

    Everyone has a preference. Very rarely, that is if it is even possible, can people help what it is that attracts them. For instance, I'm a melting pot of ethnicities. As far as I know, it currently encompasses: Cree Indian (Native American - My father's father's father was a full blooded chieftain, who ended up marrying a Caucasian woman.), Caucasian (As far as I know, it is only on my fathers side.), African, Latino, and possibly Asian.

    I am mainly attracted to Caucasians and Asians. While I can see beauty in other ethnicities, it mainly seems to be for aesthetics. This doesn't mean that I am a brainwashed racist. All it means is that I have preferences.

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  • Nobody is attracted to everyone and you can't really choose what you like. You're fine.

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  • that guy was just being a racist ass. ignore him.

    just because you are sexually attracted to people of a certain race, there's nothing wrong with it. besides, you can't control who or what you are attracted to.

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  • You rejected him andhurt his feelings...he then used the race guilt card to get back at you and it worked...so your even now...but we dont really control who we are initially attracted to...although attraction over time changes and most of us realize that compatibleness is important

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  • So what? I'm a white girl and I'm into caramel skinned guys. If you're into a certain type of person then you are. Nothing wrong with personal preference.

    The guy who got rejected is just upset for being rejected. I'd take anything he says with a grain of salt until he gets over the hurt.

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  • I'm a white guy and I love Black girls with big booty's, It's just preference.

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