This sounds like Sexual Sadism Disorder. This is only a problem if it interferes with your life (causes mental/physical pain in some way), since you say you will not hurt others. See the DSM-5 - 302.84
If you do feel pain, or maybe just want to know for sure what's going on, a professional is always the best bet. You absolutely can get excellent care from psychiatric professionals. I walked into my local government's psychiatry center after having some issues with my depression, and I got free appointments to see a psychiatrist, and it's working out great.
Is it normal I fantasise about killing people
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This sounds like Sexual Sadism Disorder. This is only a problem if it interferes with your life (causes mental/physical pain in some way), since you say you will not hurt others. See the DSM-5 - 302.84
If you do feel pain, or maybe just want to know for sure what's going on, a professional is always the best bet. You absolutely can get excellent care from psychiatric professionals. I walked into my local government's psychiatry center after having some issues with my depression, and I got free appointments to see a psychiatrist, and it's working out great.