Is it normal for your partner to change so much?

25% Normal
14 Comments

When we were first together my partner used to make naughty calls or texts, sometimes he would tell me stimulating sexual stories about what he would like to do to me, and of course I would do the same and it made for a great sex life. He also had the normal flashes of jealousy, nothing outrageous but enough to make me feel wanted and secure.

Gradually he changed though, the naughty calls and texts stopped, and so did the stimulating story telling and teasing. I have tried so hard to revive this part, but have been unable to. An example would be me starting to tell him how I would like to touch him and he will cut me off with a coarse comment or completely change the subject. He also stopped any jealous comments and now is obsessed by the thought of me being with another man and him watching. This seems a common fantasy on this site, but he wants me to really do it. He's stopped asking because I was getting so upset, although he continues to hint.

I don't know what to do to get the man I love back. Do all men change this much?

Voting Results
25% Normal
Based on 111 votes (28 yes)
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Comments ( 14 )
  • seali001
    12 years ago

    He is a stone cold freak..lol..just being with you isn't doing it for him any more..Maybe he is bi or bi-curious and needs to test the waters in a safe enviroment..just my opinion

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  • Audacia
    12 years ago

    Not all men change that much. Sounds like he took a complete and total U Turn. Maybe you made him feel inadequate somehow to a point he felt he couldn't satisfy you. Thus now wants to see how you'd react with another guy.

    But hmm i'm sure over a long time the eagerness for these sexual desires will die down a little but not completely. Maybe he just likes going through little sexual phases...

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    Unlike him, I'd keep that part very alive, haha.

    How long have you been together exactly? Can it be that this happened when you first started to date and now that the infatuation is gone, this is the result? Maybe he just isn't interested in it anymore. Maybe you did it so many times that it's become a chore to him and taking a very long break for it might be the solution?

    It could be anything, you'd have to ask him why it changed. People change with time. I don't think only men change.

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  • fullhouse
    11 years ago

    If you have tried enough to save the relationship but he hasn't then dont put up with it. Give him space n see what he does. Either he'll cheat or he'll come back to you.
    DON'T GIVE IN TO HIS FANTASY!! This dosen't feel right cuz it isn't right

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  • Leviathanel
    11 years ago

    i have the perfect multi-tool/cure all medicine that will solve your relationship problems.

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  • intellectuallychallengedmaybe
    11 years ago

    its probably been a while since your last post.

    are you still with him?

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  • kittylitter101
    11 years ago

    People do change over time.. Unfortunately, you may just be discovering who he really is and what he really wants

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  • deepimpact
    12 years ago

    Sounds like he's got so caught up in his own fantasy's he's forgotten what is normal or even acceptable in a relationship.

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  • Verstehen
    12 years ago

    He's bored sexually. If you've already reached out and tried to revive the sex life and he pushes you away, there's nothing you can do. Find a man who will treat you right, a man who loves you so much he couldn't possibly stand seeing you with another man. And it also sounds like he might be a cheater (the jealousy thing.) He's treating you like an object he can share.

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  • AngAnders112
    12 years ago

    There's a stranger in my house
    It took awhile to figure out
    There's no way you can be who you say you are, you gotta be someone else
    'Cause he wouldn't hurt me like that
    And he wouldn't treat me like you do
    He would adore me; he wouldn't ignore me
    So I'm convinced, there's a stranger in my house

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      12 years ago

      I felt that, well put! I never thought in a million years he would do something to hurt me.

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  • Oooby
    12 years ago

    It sounds like he's cheating on you, but still loves you. I know that makes literally no sense, but It's happened before.

    Maybe...He's going through an "early mid life crisis"?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      12 years ago

      Actually your reply makes a lot of sense, I don't think he's fully having an affair, but has probably been seriously tempted. I don't know maybe its for his self-esteem?

      Your right though he does still love me, but maybe he has lost interest in working on our relationship. It seems I'm not giving him that 'buzz' anymore.

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  • xstarrynightx
    12 years ago

    This just sounds like bad news to be honest. It may be even another girl he's interested in?

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