It seems to me that when you have to live with someone who appears to fit the criteria of one psychological disorder or another, figuring out which diagnostic label is most appropriate is less important than working out healthy coping strategies that allow you to maintain your own sanity.
Is it normal for someone to treat their family like crap
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It's apparently a matter of some debate amongst psychologists:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/spycatcher/201712/narcissist-or-psychopath-how-can-you-tell
It seems to me that when you have to live with someone who appears to fit the criteria of one psychological disorder or another, figuring out which diagnostic label is most appropriate is less important than working out healthy coping strategies that allow you to maintain your own sanity.