Is it normal for my husband to put me down all the time?

9% Normal
16 Comments

My husband always puts me down, nothing I do is right, and he's always angry with me about something. We've been married for nearly 16 years and I've given up several things in order to please him, friends, activities, ect...ect... but its never been enough, he keeps changing his expectations of me and that leaves me completly baffled whenever I am yelled at for doing what I thought he wanted me to do. He says I'm a burden to him, every bad thing that has happened is my fault, and his biggest mistake was marrying me in the 1st place.

Is It Normal?
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  • PrincessLollipop
    11 years ago | pl

    When you're in a relationship, your partner is supposed to lift you, make you feel loved, feel good about yourself, and be your backbone. What he is doing is not in any way right.

    You should re-evaluate your relationship & make sure this is how you want to live for the rest of your life...

    You deserve someone to love you for who you are and appreciate all the things you do!

    Good luck <333

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  • lisaloo
    11 years ago | pl

    I am so sorry to hear this. No, it is not right for him to put you down. That says more about him than it says about you. I sincerely hope you can find the strength and courage to leave and work on rebuilding your life and your happiness. It's better to be alone than to be hurt by someone who supposedly loves you.

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  • Avant-Garde
    11 years ago | pl

    You've "given up thing to please him"?

    Are you sure he didn't "force you" to do this or did you really do it on your own?

    How long his this been going on?

    He sounds abusive! This is not normal behavior.... Abuser have the tendencies, like a cult, to isolate their victims so, they can have total control. What did your friends/family say/think about all of this? I'm surprised that they weren't suspicious or called someone.

    I think you're somewhat in denial about all of this. You seem to want to please him and as if you actually believe his bull. You need to get away from him somehow. Call your family or friends, someone you trust. Get witnesses and stay far away from him. He has serious problems! I know it's hard, but this is something that you ABSOLUTELY MUST DO!!!!!

    Good Luck!

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    • lil_imp
      11 years ago | pl

      My faimly did not approve of our marraige at all, my Granparents attempted to pay me $ 30,000 ( >o that's not a typo ) to leave him after 2 1/2 years of marraige. I tore up the check and walked away, so from that point on I was disinherited.
      But everything happens for a reason and I know so much more about myself then I would have otherwise, I have my children and they have taught me as much as I have taught them. My husband walked out on me and thekids

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      • Avant-Garde
        11 years ago | pl

        Your parents shouldn't have disowned you.

        But is everything all right now? Has the situation been resolved?

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  • Omglmffao123
    11 years ago | pl

    Omgoodness, no its not! He shouldn't be treating you like that!
    I know it might be hard to do, but you should think about the alternative, before it escalates to physical violence.
    No woman deserves that, and I truly hope You find the courage and strength to help yourself.
    Good luck!!!

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  • blue_avocado
    7 years ago | pl

    sounds like my husband of 20 years. Look up Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Borderline Personality Disorder. If either of these fit, let me know, I'm on a great fb group for them. When you know what it is you are dealing with, your perspective changes. It's hard. Sorry.

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  • Nokiot9
    8 years ago | pl

    Sounds like my gf lol. It just never ends! What u should do is just leave him and make him see what life would be like without u around and if it's meant to be, he will come back and probably apologize. But talk to him first. Don't just leave him. And expect shit to happen and him to know why and what he is expected to do. Just tell him u don't feel like he loves or respects you anymore and that you are thinking of a divorce or a trial separation. That'll get his attention. And if it doesn't, you might need to follow through on your threat.

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  • sega31098
    11 years ago | pl

    Threaten to leave him if he doesn't stop.

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  • 800imawesome
    11 years ago | pl

    Walk up to him, preferably on a roof, and follow these simple steps:
    1:THIS
    2:IS
    3:SPARTA!!!!!

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  • bmommy22313
    11 years ago | pl

    Tell him to go to hell!
    Seriously I've been with guys like that, my husband does it sometimes, but doesn't realize it, tell him that you don't deserve it, and leave!

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  • karmasAbich
    11 years ago | pl

    Aww that's not normal. You need to get out of that situation... It's not a good life to be living. It sounds you deserve a lot better than that. Everyone does.

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  • iEnjoyLickingToes
    11 years ago | pl

    Put your toes down on his face.

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  • Avant-Garde
    11 years ago | pl

    Fucking Shit! I accidentally hit "yes, it's normal"!

    What the fuck is wrong with me?! I'm so sorry about that-_-

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    • lil_imp
      11 years ago | pl

      Wow no problem!! I'm scared to death and jesus this pain is almost more then I can bare

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