Its possible he was abused and/or forced to repress any sort of sexual feelings when he was younger. He may have come from a deeply religious or abusive family, and was possibly punished and made to feel deeply ashamed if he was caught masturbating or having any lustful thoughts, whether straight or gay (possibly moreso if there were any gay thoughts or feelings).He must feel a lot of shame or fear to even have those sort of feelings. It is possible he was even ridiculed or abused for having those feelings. He may been forced to repress his feelings, and associate them with sin and/or punishment, and he cries cause hes deeply scared and confused, a part of him knows its normal to have sex in a relationship, but another part says its wrong to do this. the more he tries to go on with it, the more those fears and sense of guilt appear.
In short, he wants to go all the way, but he cant cause he was taught to feel ashamed and bad for wanting to.
Its very difficuly to undo that kind of damage, but if you can, talk to him, be supportive and ask him about his past. If this doesnt help, maybe seek professional therapy. Be supportive either way.
Its possible that something else my be making it hard for him to have sex, but its most likely he is ashamed to have sex.
Best of luck to the both of you, and sorry this is so long :)
your friend, legion.
IIN for my boyfriend to cry if we do anything more than kissing?
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Its possible he was abused and/or forced to repress any sort of sexual feelings when he was younger. He may have come from a deeply religious or abusive family, and was possibly punished and made to feel deeply ashamed if he was caught masturbating or having any lustful thoughts, whether straight or gay (possibly moreso if there were any gay thoughts or feelings).He must feel a lot of shame or fear to even have those sort of feelings. It is possible he was even ridiculed or abused for having those feelings. He may been forced to repress his feelings, and associate them with sin and/or punishment, and he cries cause hes deeply scared and confused, a part of him knows its normal to have sex in a relationship, but another part says its wrong to do this. the more he tries to go on with it, the more those fears and sense of guilt appear.
In short, he wants to go all the way, but he cant cause he was taught to feel ashamed and bad for wanting to.
Its very difficuly to undo that kind of damage, but if you can, talk to him, be supportive and ask him about his past. If this doesnt help, maybe seek professional therapy. Be supportive either way.
Its possible that something else my be making it hard for him to have sex, but its most likely he is ashamed to have sex.
Best of luck to the both of you, and sorry this is so long :)
your friend, legion.