Is it normal for him to fancy her again?

37% Normal
10 Comments

My fiance fancied this girl a few years ago, and her name appears in a lot of other people's names.

Anyway, his new boss has her name in her name (Eg. Ella/Bella). The example is not the actual name though.

I'm worried that he'll remember the girl he really liked, and was possibly in love with, and start to think about her and fantasise about her again.

I'm also worried that he may be attracted to his boss because of it, or there will be coworkers that he's attracted to.

I know he would never cheat, we're engaged and have been together over three years and that's just not him.

I have a mental illness and I do have paranoia, and I just don't know what to do.

Do you think he will remember her because of this? We used to talk about her a lot, but her name is a taboo in this house now.

So, is it normal for him to fancy her again?

Or rather, if that happened, would it be normal, and would he stop loving me?

Voting Results
37% Normal
Based on 51 votes (19 yes)
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Comments ( 10 )
  • overweightdoomsayer
    12 years ago

    Don't worry about it.He is with you not HER! If he wanted to be with her he would be with her right now,right?Stop letting fear ruin your life.It's not a good start for a marriage if you don't trust him .Trust and comunication are the pillars of a good marriage.

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  • AT33
    14 years ago

    pray for your relationship, dont do something stupid like what alexisfreak just said. God is the only one who can save a relationship!

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  • alexisfreak
    14 years ago

    If you are really worried, make him not think about her and think about you. Have sex with him or something. Entertain him!

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  • Argollun
    14 years ago

    Does your fiancee love you? Do you think your fiancee could fall in love with a girl he liked two years ago? Talk to your mom first, or an older lady you trust, and then if you're still worried him about it. It's the unasked questions that destroy marriages.

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  • scarfface
    14 years ago

    it's just you're sickness getting to you , you have nothing to worry about exept that ,,,,

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  • Jains
    14 years ago

    Don't worry about the name thing...
    Have you talked about how you feel with him?

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  • oskilover18
    15 years ago

    It's normal to worry a bit and while I don't get jealous very easily it is totally normal for most people to feel this way. TALK TO HIM. Tell him FIRST that you TRUST HIM and know that he is loyal to you, but that you become insecure and are irrationally afraid that this name will trigger renewed feelings on his part. Lead all of your sentences with, "I feel" and "I am sometimes fearful."

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  • Jim_Pfoss
    15 years ago

    You do sound horribly insecure. You are actually making up reasons to blame him for imaginary transgressions! Perhaps your psych problems are getting away from you. Maybe you need an adjustment on your meds. If you can't find a way to trust the guy, YOU will force him to find someone else.

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  • morbid29
    15 years ago

    i believe he will still love you because of this and even though he might fantasise he knows your the only one for him...

    morbid demise

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    • princesst76
      15 years ago

      Dont worry, Its very unlikely he will fantasise over her as they must have split up for reason and you must still be together for a reason.

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