Is it normal for a mother to feel like this?

80% Normal
11 Comments

Im only 24,and Im married with two children who I love with all my heart, but I look at my friends and they are skinny and beautiful,they are doing what they love,can go out whenever they want,spend as much of their money on themselves as they want and I get SO jelous! I used to be a dancer, and my friends are all moving up in their careers and winning world championships in dance and they look so happy. Where as Im stuck in this country hick town being a fat stay at home mum. Yes I go to the Gym alot and watch what I eat (ish) but the weight isnt going anywhere! And to make it worse the church that I go to is peeing me off! Ive talked to a few of my friends about it but they just give me the whole "jesus" crap which I SO dont want to hear at the momment, sometimes I just feel like slapping them across the face and telling them to shutup because they dont know what they're talking about. They are either single and childless or old and boring LoL Anyway, reading back on this it really doesnt sound that bad but its just so dang frustrating to feel like your floating through life with no real goal or purpose,living in wishes and what if's, looking at other people who are doing what you love.

Voting Results
80% Normal
Based on 44 votes (35 yes)
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Comments ( 11 )
  • flumflum98
    13 years ago

    Have I got news for you. I am 50 years old and my wife just turned 52. We have been married 21 years and we tried to have a baby with no luck. I even had "male" surgery which didn't help. Thank goodness for our wholesome loving marriage. However, when I hear of another expectant couple, it is the hardest thing to take. I can barely even choke up a "congradulations". Check out some infertility websites. you will find couples, especially women, who practically risk their lives to have a child, who sound on the verge emotional death from a miscarriage. Some would give anything even to adopt.
    You have no idea how lucky you are.Do not be jealous of your friends, You are ahead of them. Going out, buying fancy this and hi-tech that is a joke compared to raising a family. That can always come later. Devote yourself to your family, raise your kids to be winners and never,under any circumstances show any sign of regret around them. And ignore that silly church altogether. You own yourself.

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    • Anara
      13 years ago

      Thankyou all, it has taken me a long time to finally relize and pin point what was going on with me at that time. But I can honestly say now that once I stopped looking at other people and started looking at myself and being grateful for what I have that I am truely happy with where Im at. No, im not skinny, no im not rich. But I have two beautiful children,a group of genuine ,real friends and I best friend and husband who loves me for me. This is what people long for. I will no doubt continue to have my daily struggles with being a parent, but I can now be happy with this season that Im in at the momment! who knows what doors might open down the track, but for now I will do the best job that I can in being a loving mother and wife.And to flumflum98, I respect what you said and you are right! (except for maybe the "owning yourself" part but thats a whole other topic!) I actually have a good friend who cannot concieve naturally,being there for her and watching her struggle with countless failed attemps at IVF taught me alot about how lucky I am. Thankyou God for being so patient with me and putting up with my winging yet again! Lol

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  • beastie
    12 years ago

    You must have realised having children would change your life forever? The minute they are born, life is no longer all about you!

    Having said that EVERYONE gets crises of confidence sometimes - young, old, childfree, mothers, fathers, everyone. You just need to move through this and don't let it stop you being a good mother.

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  • TieDiedSuperstar
    13 years ago

    Your friends are/will be jealous of you if they don't have kids. Some of them, anyways.

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  • lukex037
    13 years ago

    I think that everyone finds themselves in a slump at one point or another. I also think that it's not fair to yourself to compare your life with your friends. My sister, age 26, had her first child in February. She too gets down from time to time seeing the freedom others her age have but at the end of the day your life is what you make it & she couldn't imagine it without her little girl.

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  • strawberrybanana
    13 years ago

    I felt that way too when I first had kids.

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  • so_damn_unpretty
    13 years ago

    get a dog? or for a little excitement a minuature goat? a pig? ....girraffe?

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  • sherry
    13 years ago

    You need to make some positve changes in your life . The housewife role is not for everybody. You are young. Take classes to fine tune your resume and when they enter school , go back to work . It saved my life.

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  • mtnw
    13 years ago

    it is a boring life to be a stay at home mom, therefore, i suggest that you look around to find something to get you out of the house, alone. think about things that you would like to do for yourself, get a sitter, and start working/doing that.

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  • runnergirl
    13 years ago

    Unfortunately normal, but not healthy. You need to find thing that make you feel alive and happy and you look forward to it. I'm also a SAHM and I used to be in that rut, spiritually, too. You have to take care of yourself first or you'll be too depressed to take care of your family. Mourn the loss of your singleness and pre-baby body and move on to something different. Set new goals!

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    Read the femine mystic. It is about women and feminism. U might like it. Ur trying to find somethg more valuable in ur life and maybe tht book can help u find it

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