Is it normal for a girl to be an antifeminist?

People should stop saying women and men are equals. That's like saying three is equal to four and bananas taste like carpet. Although everyone should be treated equally until they have done something to lose that privilege.

I don't think you're necessarily describing "feminism" but that being said, there's nothing wrong with wanting the things you listed!

I love it when a guy does polite things for me, too, and I rather like the idea of being "taken care of" financially. That doesn't really have much to do with feminism, as an overall ideal is quite different from personal preference.

The only thing I would point out is that what works for you doesn't work for everybody. We're all different, and we all have different needs. To some women, having a career IS the most important thing to them! Some men have similar needs to women, and some women have similar needs to men. There's not much point in being "against" those who are different from you. By that same token, don't sweat it when people are against you for being different! You know what you want, go for it :) You won't change someone else and they can't change you.

Feminists were the useful idiots of rich capitalists. They used them bc they wanted more people working (to lower wages) and more people to consume products. Stupid bourgeois women who were bored (almost all the feminist leaders) ended up fucking over the large, large majority of women who NOW DO NOT HAVE THE OPTION TO STAY HOME WITH THEIR KIDS. Family's used to be able to support themselves on one income and have a mother at home with the kids. Now only upper middle class families can afford this, meaning most women have LOST the option to stay home and raise their children.

My wife is anti-feminist, highly educated, and a free thinker. She understands what works best for families and hates the feminist BS that saturates our culture. She wanted a virile man who wasn't afraid of responsibility, being assertive, or of treating her sweetly. And I wanted a FEMININE woman (the opposite of a "feminist") who is loyal, loves children, family, and isn't always trying to "compete" with me in some stupid pissing contest.

Men and women should be equal.

A woman can conform to the traditional roles but as long as she has the option not to. She shouldn't feel pressured into it just because that is what is expected of her.

Same for if a man wants to perform the roles usually associated with women.

Just because career isn't important to you, doesn't mean it isn't important to others, and I don't want to get payed less because of my gender.

I don't think you should call yourself "anti-feminist" until you actually understand the history and meaning of feminism. Based on your question, you clearly don't have a clue what you are talking about.

I dont really know how this whole change came about but I personally think idiotic reality TV shows have some part to play in it. Younger and younger woman are watching insipid shows like Keeping up with the Kardashians and Jersey Shore which show absolutely no redeeming nurturing or traditional qualities that women took on 50-60 yrs ago. The woman on these shows are aggressive, dominating, and controlling. More intent on getting attention, or a perfect tan then what roles women naturally excel at. That role not serving a man, but nurturing and caring for a family.

I think you seem to understand this very well, and sadly you are in a fading minority of women out there. I think you dont fit the mold at all of what I was talking about in my original post, when I said "you" I really meant it in general terms, not specifically you in terms of talking about understanding equality. I think you would make a great wife for someone one day and that man would be a very lucky individual.

Good Luck

Now what we seem to be forgetting is that even though we are humans we are still all animals in the sense that we share similar qualities with animals, aggression, competition, social bonds, etc. Females in the wild are the main care giver for the young of the species, look at any major mammal species (grizzly bear, lions, gorillas, even whales) and in all of them the males have minimal or even non-existent roles in raising the young. This is because females are naturally the more caring, more feminine, and the better nurterers then males, this same idea applies to humans as much as people may argue it, you really cant argue the logic I have applied here. Now for some reason (most likely arrogance) humans seem to think these same ideas dont apply to them and we are different or "better", we arent, we just like to think we are. Females make the better care givers in raising young, in divorce cases the mother is almost always given custody for a reason.

Now with this idea of feminism and equality we are encouraging women to take on more masculine qualities, aggression, competition, dominance, etc. In doing this, I think, we are upsetting the natural order. Its the reason why so many men, myself included, tend to start rejecting relationships and marriage because I consider myself as the dominant head of a household. Thats not to say I will beat my wife if dinner isnt ready, abuse her, or mistreat her in any way. Of course I would never do that, no one who loves someone would do that. BUT it means I would reject being constantly told what to do and when to do it, nor would I want to tell my wife constantly what to do and when to do it. If she understood her role then I wouldnt need to at all. Same applies to me for her.

Again continued (sorry its just a great discussion)

Again I have to say it, great topic and post for discussion. Hits home even more for me as I am a 31 yr old male, single, that somewhat recently was in a relationship (over a year ago) with a female who would very much fit the mold of a dominant personality, though not a feminist.

The problem with the world today, or at least America as I see it, are these shifting paradigms and unrealistic push for equality. If you have 10 openings for a job with 100 potential applicants, have each applicant go through the same criteria for the job and have the top 10 applicants get the job, that used to the motto of our country, and we prospered because of it. Now when you have 10 job openings we have to fill 2 of them with blacks, 2 of them with hispanics, give one to an Asian (no offense) give one to an Indian (India), a woman has to be in there somewhere, we also need an Arabian person, that leaves mayby 2 job openings left that will actually be filled with the people who "earned" it, i.e. passed the test, qualifying education, etc....

This same idea seems to have infected the dating/social world as well, where no matter what the actual qualities of a person are we absolutely have to accept them as equal and give them equal treatment.

Continued.....

Great Post and topic to bring up.

The problem with most feminists is they enjoy all those things that you listed as what men are supposed to do for woman, but when it comes to a man getting preferential treatment, or what they deem as preferential treatment, they are staunchly against it.

Its very difficult for men this day and age since role reversals and entire paradigms seem to be shifting. Feminists want equal treatment but they also want to be treated in the traditional sense when it comes to those topics that benefit them (i.e. pulling out chairs, men paying for dinner, opening car doors, etc). This to me seems like a classic case of wanting your cake and wanting to eat it too.

I have no problem with giving women equal treatment, in fact I would rather they are given equal treatment BUT I think equal treatment should extend to everything not just those topics that benefit women. If you want the same pay for the same work, which is completely reasonable, then you should also be more then willing to pull out that wallet when the check comes for the lobster dinner you ordered. If you arent willing to do that then you arent willing to accept equality.

Plenty of women would grudingly pay for their fair share while secretly deciding not to bother with the guy who accepts them doing that, perhaps even writing him off as cheap. If you fit that mold then you dont want equality or dont understand it at least.

True_Misanthrope

Hmm, I can't edit posts on my phone and that's what I use to get on here. I'm not using the "mobi" version and they aren't updating the app anymore. So I didn't know that, thanks for the info. I have legitimately never signed on from a computer, don't even know what my password is, and really prefer using my phone for this site, so I doubt I'll be able to use it. But good to know anyway.

As for your sex, why are you being so weird about it? Are you afraid saying you are male or female would give your statements less credibility? Are you trying to make a statement to the effect that "gender doesn't matter, we're all just people?" If the latter, that's hilariously retarded. Everything in science, psychology, and even common sense and experience indicate otherwise.

But yeah you're not making any legitimate arguments anyway so I don't even see why the OP or anyone else should respond to you anymore.

Jesus, I just noticed a ton of typos and grammar errors, sorry. I am really tired at the moment and didn't read it before I posted it :/. Hope what I was saying still made sense

Btw, that was just my take on it, I'n not trying to put words in the OP's mouth.

Oops, accidentally hit enter too soon again...

Continued: but then you imply that you are attracted to "defiant" or dominate women and look down on those who aren't. Now THAT doesn't make much sense to me since two dominant personalities rarely end up marring each other (usually there's no emotion/non-physical attraction to begin with)

True_Misanthrope,

Get into a relationship where both of you are "defiant" and tell me how that works out for you. Almost no couple is ever "equal" in decision making etc. there is almost always someone who is more dominant and that is the natural state of things and how it works best. Women tend to be much more inclined toward the submissive/less dominant role. There is a reason women are attracted to dominant, alpha males much more than pushover betas. I think what the OP was indicating is that she is that her ideal bf/husband would be an alpha male who can take care of her/offer security, financially, emotionally, romantically/sexually and make her feel like a lady (for lack of a better term). Someone that makes her feel free to be her true feminine self without her needing to worry about trying to compete with him in areas she's not even interested in.

As a married man I can tell you defiance is not a value in a relationship. That's silly. On the one hand, it is natural to want to be the dominant one (and you show some signs of that), but then you say

OP,

Yes, that is what I'm saying, but that is mostly due to our shared political/philosophical beliefs and not a representation of society or even most men who are like us. Even though I support preserving and diversity and ethnic/racial heritage/linage I'm also fairly pragmatic and focus a lot on values and character as well. So while I don't normally think marriage with someone who is of mixed race is a good thing, with your case because of what you are (East Asian, which is the best possible mix if you are going so) and who you are (your very healthy feminine character), I would support and encourage you finding a healthy Western male counterpart.

But yeah, I really don't think you have anything to worry about. A lot of guys, even the less healthy in that regard will instinctually find your true femininity very attractive. And the ones who are healthier, who know what they want...well, I don't think I even need to say how much they will want you.

I agree and I disagree, ma'am. I mean, you consider it "hot" to be dominated and told what to do? Creepy.

OP,

I do have a younger brother but unfortunately he doesn't really share my views. Some of them but not most. I'd say he has hope and is a lot better off than most guys but he's still got a long way to go. Plus he's a year or two younger than you.

Most of the other men I know with the same beliefs also want ethnically European children. Which to me is understandable: wanting to preserve the race of your parents, grandparents, and ancestors along with your regional genes, ethnic character traits, in a world that is increasingly mixed, and losing any and all sense of identity beyond what you consume (I.e. what type of video games, music, beer, etc. you buy). It's funny how we preach about living "diversity" in the west but are doing everything possible to destroy it.

I'm not attributing your beliefs to your (partial) ethnicity, nor is my disappointment personal. I just merely wish there were more white women who felt this way. And I know you are more white than Chinese (people don't actually get 50% of their genes from each parents, it's always an unequal mix and from your description it sounds like you're more white). I wouldn't wish feminism and it's destructive results on any family, people, culture, or nation.

Back to the topic though. Sorry if I already mentioned this but there is a great YouTube video of an excerpt of this French thinker being interviewed (with English subtitles) that summarizes and articulates many of the points I made above really well. The video is titled: "Alain Soral on Feminism, subtitled."

And yes, I'm sure you and my wife would get along wonderfully :). It's not often she gets to meet other women who are healthy and secure in their femininity. Just today we had some female and male friends over and the topic came up (one of them saw a book I had on the subject) and I tried to explain a few of the things we've talked about here and they just couldn't understand or make the connections :/

OP,

I have a response partially typed but I've been so busy with finals I haven't had time to finish it. Just letting you know I am going to respond still, just not sure how long it will be.

Stern_rules,

I know almost no one reads paragraphs. I wasn't talking to anyone but the OP and the few potential ppl who might be interested enough to read more than two sentences.

As a quote from a seinfeld episode George states something a long the lines of:
The feminist want everything equal, everything! But when the check comes, where are they?

ps no one reads paragraphs

Hmm I don't know why but it was showing some of your responses as your user name and others as "anonymous story author" but now they are all showing up under the later. Weird. Maybe it's because I'm on the iPhone app that is no longer being kept up by them but still gives you access to IIN (although I'm sure soon enough it won't work anymore).

I didn't mean to suggest you should hurry and jump into a relationship, especially given how unworthy and incompatible most men (at least Western men) would be for you. Sadly, feminist and other kinds of propaganda have messed men up a lot too. There aren't hardly enough truly virile men around anymore, instead we have a bunch of guys who live in perpetual adolescence; man-boys. Most of whom are either effeminate or hedonistic pigs who make a mockery of masculinity (i.e. "gangstas").

Anyway, I definitely understand and support you having patience and waiting to find the right guy. That's what my wife did, although we met each other just in time because she was starting to wonder if there was something wrong with her, as in her standards being too high, since she had no experience with men because of them.

I am a little disappointed to find out you're half Chinese just because it is so rare to find a gender-healthy girl/woman in the West these days. Given what you said about your cultural identity and such though, I think you are still very unique. And I understand you not being attracted to the men in China, on multiple levels. Given your beliefs I think you would be better off with an intelligent, masculine westerner, but that's just my opinion.

Continued..(wouldn't let me post more over phone):

As for America, yes it is going downhill fast, and even the public knows it. The American public has never been so pessimistic about their future as they are now, and our generation is even more so. China's success is due to a lot more than just having a male dominated political sphere, although I don't think you meant it was solely because of that. Many country's politics are dominated by men (think of almost any African country) yet they are living in horrible conditions. China's success is due to their authoritarian government and policies which Americans would fall over themselves trying to criticize, labeling it fascist/communist etc.

Personally, I disagree with our current global economic model, and think regional trading blocs offer more independence, stability, and security. Sadly, American globalism and globalist values (which "feminism" is a large part of bc they want women in the workforce) are spreading around the world. It's like a poison or a parasite that destroys traditional families pursuing its own selfish interests.

I believe that culture and family should come before economic "progress" whose interests often conflict. You can have a healthy economy, culture, and families however it would require a change of national structure, values, and wouldn't be as obsessed with constant economic growth (which is unsustainable). This belief in constant economic growth, which goes hand in hand with free market capitalism harms families so that a few greedy ultra-rich can prosper.

Theabider,

After reading through all of your comment responses I have to say I am really impressed with your grasp of the world and what I can gather to be your outlook/worldview, especially for an 18yr girl! You have a better understanding of gender relations and what will make you and your future family happy at 18 than most Western women ever will. In the West feminist ideals and worldviews are strongly promoted in Hollywood/the media and academia (two areas heavily dominated by a hostile tribal minority that cannot be criticized without violating one of the strongest taboos). Because this propaganda targets women's vanity and the way it attempts to polarize the "sides" (antifeminist women are slaves, men are monster enslavers) women today have a very hard time not falling into this trap. Most women (and people in general) just don't care to think about and question the norm that much to come to any truly independent opinion. I mean think about it, 99% of (western) women have NEVER HEARD any legitimate argument against the feminist worldview. Instead, all they get is straw-man arguments set up by feminists (or the occasional uneducated, bigoted misogynist which the media loves to showcase). So most women think of it as freedom versus slavery, which is absolutely wrong. As I pointed out in my comment above, women have actually LOST RIGHTS DUE TO FEMINISM.

I find it very interesting that you are an 18yr white female living in China. How did that happen? Until very recently, my cousin ran 3 schools in China. Also, my wife is only 3 years older than you, so you never know when you might meet your future husband.

*am going to make sure of my independence and my own contentedness before I even think about any shit like that.

Well, reading through your argument has given me a good laugh.
You can be stuck in an unhappy marriage if you want to, by all means go ahead. Or spend your entire life depending on another person.
I however, am

You don't sound particularly antifeminism to me, you just sound like you don't associate with it.
Do you believe that men and women should share equal rights? This is the backbone of feminism.
You don't really seem to know much about feminism.

A house divided against itself cannot stand. Mutual respect is necessary but men and women have lost their places in society and the home.

I think it's great that you have a concept of what a real relationship should be and your marriage will most likely last forever when you find the right man. Be picky, don't settle. Make sure he respects you and is not controlling as you could easily be overun by your humbleness. You deserve to be happy. If my x had those beliefs she might not be my x.

You may need to have your own money someday but if you're lucky enough to get a man like that there are always conditions you must maintain to keep him too, like youth and beauty, which could take a real shit if you don't take care of yourself.