Oh, honey, no. It's not normal to want to hurt yourself because someone else hurt you. You need to talk about this. The urge to hurt yourself comes from you feeling like you don't want the pain you're feeling to affect anyone else or not feeling like anyone cares enough to share the pain with you (believe me, I *know*), but that's not a healthy way to let it out and you know that.
As for how you actually *feel*, it's absolutely normal. There's nothing wrong with how you feel, and there has to be someone you know of who will listen to you. A parent, a friend, hell, make an appointment with the counselor at your school (you can tell people you were called down there for being a bad kid so it won't touch your rep).
Please don't cut yourself. Even if it makes you feel better for a little while, you know that doesn't solve anything and you'll just feel bad again later, *plus* you'll feel guilty for cutting, so you'll just cut more. And I'm assuming you're not a doctor, so you don't know where all the nerves and stuff are. Think about it: this guy goes out with you for two weeks and here you are cutting... what if you accidentally cut one of the nerves in your arm and all of a sudden you can't use that hand anymore? That's the rest of your life right there. For two weeks? No way.
And I know that trying to talk to people about this is scary because they say a lot of scary stuff about people who cut from pain. We're called mentally ill and personality disordered and all kinds of other stuff. That's okay. Those are just the words they use to try and explain it to each other. That doesn't have anything to do with *you*. Those words can't make you into something you aren't. They're just words.
I hope you feel better soon, and please try talking to someone about it before you decide to cut again.
is it normal being so hurt?
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Oh, honey, no. It's not normal to want to hurt yourself because someone else hurt you. You need to talk about this. The urge to hurt yourself comes from you feeling like you don't want the pain you're feeling to affect anyone else or not feeling like anyone cares enough to share the pain with you (believe me, I *know*), but that's not a healthy way to let it out and you know that.
As for how you actually *feel*, it's absolutely normal. There's nothing wrong with how you feel, and there has to be someone you know of who will listen to you. A parent, a friend, hell, make an appointment with the counselor at your school (you can tell people you were called down there for being a bad kid so it won't touch your rep).
Please don't cut yourself. Even if it makes you feel better for a little while, you know that doesn't solve anything and you'll just feel bad again later, *plus* you'll feel guilty for cutting, so you'll just cut more. And I'm assuming you're not a doctor, so you don't know where all the nerves and stuff are. Think about it: this guy goes out with you for two weeks and here you are cutting... what if you accidentally cut one of the nerves in your arm and all of a sudden you can't use that hand anymore? That's the rest of your life right there. For two weeks? No way.
And I know that trying to talk to people about this is scary because they say a lot of scary stuff about people who cut from pain. We're called mentally ill and personality disordered and all kinds of other stuff. That's okay. Those are just the words they use to try and explain it to each other. That doesn't have anything to do with *you*. Those words can't make you into something you aren't. They're just words.
I hope you feel better soon, and please try talking to someone about it before you decide to cut again.