Is it normal, as a man, to dab my penis with toilet paper after I pee?

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  • **conceals pearly white juice in pants**

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    • Lock eyes from across the room
      Down my drink while the rhythms boom
      Take your hand and skip the names
      No need here for the silly games

      Make our way through the smoke and crowd
      The club is the sky and I'm on your cloud
      Move in close as the lasers fly
      Our bodies touch and the angels cry

      Leave this place, go back to yours
      Our lips first touch outside your doors
      A whole night what we've got in store
      Whisper in my ear that you want some more

      And I jizz in my pants
      This really never happens, you can take my word
      I won't apologize, that's just absurd
      Mainly your fault for the way that you dance

      And now I jizz in my pants
      Don't tell your friends or I'll say you're a slut
      Plus it's your fault, you were rubbing my butt
      I'm very sensitive, some would say that's a plus
      Now I'll go home and change

      I need a few things from the grocery
      Do things alone now mostly
      Left me heart-broken, not lookin' for love
      Surprised in my eyes when I looked above

      The checkout counter and I saw a face
      My heart stood still, so did time and space
      Never thought that I could feel real again
      But the look in her eyes said, "I need a friend"

      She turned to me, that's when she said it
      Looked me dead in the face asked, "Cash or Credit?"

      And I jizzed in my pants
      It's perfectly normal, nothing wrong with me
      But we're going to need a clean-up on Aisle 3
      And now I'm posed in an awkward stance

      Because I jizzed in my pants
      To be fair you were flirting a lot
      Plus the way you bag cans got me bothered and hot
      Please stop acting like you're not impressed
      One more thing, I'm gonna pay by check

      Last week I saw a film
      As I recall it was a horror film
      Walked outside into the rain
      Checked my phone and saw you rang

      And I jizzed in my pants
      Speeding down the street when the red lights flash
      Need to get away, need to make a dash
      A song comes on that reminds me of you
      And I jizz in my pants

      The next day my alarm goes off
      And I jizz in my pants
      Open my window and a breeze rolls in
      And I jizz in my pants

      When Bruce Willis was dead at the end of Sixth Sense
      I jizzed in my pants
      I just ate a grape
      And I jizzed in my pants
      I went to the, jizzed in my pants

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      • Lol. **kicks tommythecat directly in groin**

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        • *Icame rips his swollen ball sack while kicking Tommy.

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