"The fact that this portrayal turns some women (and lots of men, I'll bet) on doesn't mean they want it in real life."
I'm so glad to have come across least one comment here that seemed to grasp this idea. I've not read the books nor seen the movie, but I can speculate its appeal and probably even argue that those who like it -do not- want a similar relationship. But I'm sure there are tons of readily available articles one can google that would be more credible and comprehensive than the several paragraphs I'd type up.
Well I don't think it's as black and white as that, more grey! (Excuse the puns)
The issue with both porn and BDSM is that the intensity of the sexual response can become addictive, so that some people will look for more and more extreme acts either on the screen or in reality and NO addiction is healthy. In particular, very intense sex with no emotional and/or spiritual connection can lead to other people being treated as commodities to be used and discarded or even worse.
Some people who use a lot of violent porn DO start to believe the propoganda that this is what women want and act it out in real life.
I do believe that BDSM "games" within committed egalitarian relationships can be positive for some people but this is NOT what is portrayed in Shades - the "hero" ignores her safe word and continues with sex against her will (ie RAPE) also belittles, intimidates and criticises her outside the sexual part of the relationship (ie DOMESTIC VIOLENCE).
Just as with porn, there's a real danger that some men will see this as what women want and some women with low self-esteem and/or past abuse issues will go along with it - THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT HEALTHY!
IIN about that movie 50 shades of Grey ?
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"The fact that this portrayal turns some women (and lots of men, I'll bet) on doesn't mean they want it in real life."
I'm so glad to have come across least one comment here that seemed to grasp this idea. I've not read the books nor seen the movie, but I can speculate its appeal and probably even argue that those who like it -do not- want a similar relationship. But I'm sure there are tons of readily available articles one can google that would be more credible and comprehensive than the several paragraphs I'd type up.
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Ellenna
8 years ago
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Well I don't think it's as black and white as that, more grey! (Excuse the puns)
The issue with both porn and BDSM is that the intensity of the sexual response can become addictive, so that some people will look for more and more extreme acts either on the screen or in reality and NO addiction is healthy. In particular, very intense sex with no emotional and/or spiritual connection can lead to other people being treated as commodities to be used and discarded or even worse.
Some people who use a lot of violent porn DO start to believe the propoganda that this is what women want and act it out in real life.
I do believe that BDSM "games" within committed egalitarian relationships can be positive for some people but this is NOT what is portrayed in Shades - the "hero" ignores her safe word and continues with sex against her will (ie RAPE) also belittles, intimidates and criticises her outside the sexual part of the relationship (ie DOMESTIC VIOLENCE).
Just as with porn, there's a real danger that some men will see this as what women want and some women with low self-esteem and/or past abuse issues will go along with it - THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT HEALTHY!