Is it normal...just tell me if this is normal!!

So, my boyfriend loves to watch porn and jack off. I don't care as long as he does not do it when I'm home. He says that he does not want to have sex sometimes and would rather jack off cause its easier and takes less energy and time. I feel like thats a slap in the face. And I always know when he's doing it though cause he'll take showers longer than I do. I feel hurt cause I ask him to not do it and he "promises" he won't. If I'm not home that's a different story cause it don't matter. Guys will be guys but I feel unattractive and like I'm just not even needed...it hurts but I dont know what to do about it cause there's nothing I can do. Ive developed some Bad habits So that i can seem more appealing to him. It's like I'm not useful and he goes off and hides in the bathroom. It's uncomfortable. And like I said...I could care less if I'm not home and he's going at it. It's just that when I'm home I'd like to take part. I know masturbation is healthy ... but idk how I should feel about this especially when he's swearing he doesn't do it...I'm not stupid. Is I normal for me to feel this way?!?!?