IIN to prefer to be nursing when old?

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  • If that's what you want, that's what you want.

    I would hate for my grandmother, who is 87, to be in a nursing home. There's too often abuse there. She was recently in rehab for recovery after a broken hip. It's a great facility she has been to many times over the last 20-25 years post surgery and illness; attends a physio class there twice a week. Staff are generally amazing. And even there, her last visit, she had two nurses who were so nasty to her. She was too scared to report them. How awful must they be to non verbal or general dementia patients?

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    • I don’t want other family members to be placed in a nursing home, and I’m currently helping care for an elderly family member now. It’s my wish for myself. I don’t think everyone should agree with my opinion, and truly i don’t blame others for not wanting to be in a home when they’re older.

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      • As I said, your life, your choice. I hope you don't get the awful staff.

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        • Thanks. And really I couldn’t do it to my parents though, especially my mom.

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    • There have been a number of cases in the UK in recent years where care staff were caught being abusive assholes on spy-cameras and by reporters using covert filming.

      The legality is complicated, but the official body responsible for monitoring the quality of care in English nursing homes has given its seal of approval to relatives installing covert monitoring cameras in their relatives' private rooms.

      You're right about the staff in such places often being good. That's pretty amazing, given that they're usually poorly trained, paid peanuts and dealing with elderly people, particularly those with dementia, can be extremely challenging.

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      • Yeah, we've had similar cases. It's horrific. My cousin started her nursing career working at one of the worst nursing homes in Australia. The stories she told...

        Fortunately, it has been shut down. I don't know what became of the residents. Most were violent ex prisoners, and for some reason, this nursing home was where they all got dumped if they were no longer able to be provided for in prison. So it was a double shot of mostly awful staff, paired with some awful residents and a reputation with the local fire fighters to not respond to emergency alarms because it was usually just triggered by out of control residents. The staff were regularly physically and sexually harrassed/assaulted by residents and many staff were awful in their own ways.

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