Is it normal to not want to take the plunge?

Marrying yes, having children no. The former can be undone, the later requires murder.

I'm sure there is a girl for you to love who doesn't want those things either. ;)

Now tell us the story!

okay. So, several times after the ex-misses and i finished...hmm how to put this delicately...fucking like dogs, she would stay there with her ass up in the air, head planted in the pillow, arms along side, which was an amusing sight by the way. It kinda struck me as odd to stay like that for several minutes after we came. But, I thought maybe she was just exhausted, paralyzed by orgasm or stuck after fuck as I like to call it...or will now. So, over a couple of months every time we finish in that position that is how she stayed. Then, one day i went in to take a shower afterward and I discovered I  needed another bar of soap. I walk out of the bathroom and I see her leaning up side down against the wall with her chin crammed to her chest! Then it all clicked. She was trying to assist my sperm on their journey through her Fallopian tubes by use of gravity. I recalled hearing somewhere that it increases the chances of fertilization. I was pissed and told her to show me her birth control pills which she could not do. Apparently, she never got her prescription refilled. And she was determined to have my kid, whether I agreed or not.

Hmmm, you have to remember just how unfair that is being to the kids, eventually your feelings at having not wanted kids will have to show through in some form or another, be it lack of patience, lack of attention, or overall nonchalence. I only know because I could see myself being the exact same way.

You should absolutely not let the pressure that society exhibits effect you in any way towards getting married and having children. Very few, VERY FEW, of those married people with children are truly happy. They just put on a big song and dance to make YOU think they are happy. God forbid anybody interprets their marriage and family as anything but perfect after all.

I can also agree with you very much regarding the dating "pool" and the ridiculous options you find in it. Eventually you will just not bother with it anymore, in much the same way I did, try some volunteer work for something you enjoy (like dogs or cats) its far more fulfilling then random dating. Cheaper too.

Just women in the 20-24 bracket.

Well you are good not to have a baby with her since you do not want children. You saved the children or child a possibly crazy life without the perfect family setting.

Having kids means working more, being appreciated less by a woman who feels that she is suddenly the most wise and important goddess on earth just because she squat a kid out of her vagoo, being considered a massive douchebag if you dont kiss her ass 24/7 and having to spend money on cutesy shit that the kid doesnt need but mom has to have 2 sets of 6 multi-colored bibs, the diapers with the cool design and the entire set of baby Einstein videos.

Have you ever had to sit through a mandatory presentation on the beauty of motherhood? I would bet so if you are so against having kids. And to hell with marriage. If I want to lose half my money I will go to a strip club. At least I will get something in return for it.

The phrase "sexually transmitted children" cracked me up :)

I really cannot understand anyone who would try to force someone else into parenthood. Do they not see how that is almost guaranteed to end badly? My aunt kinda did that with her partner (though with three kids...I mean...he's a biologist so he had to know how it was happening...)

Personally, I desperately want kids (but not marriage) but I have friends who don't, including one I've actually said, "don't have kids. Really" to.

I don't think it is right to have kids unless you want them. So many people seem to have kids nowadays simply because it's what you're "meant" to do. It'll more than likely breed resentment in you and that's not fair on you, your partner and especially not any kids. The possibility that fatherhood would become something you loved is there, but it's a fucking big gamble with a lot of lives involved.

...crap I forgot the question.

Ah. I think I answered it. For my personal perspective, I kinda reversed it to would I be willing to NOT have kids in exchange for a relationship with "the one" - I put maybe. I doubt it, but it could happen.

I hope that wasn't all too ranty :-S

There are women out there that would prefer to remain childless, just as there are men out there that would prefer to remain childless. I am not one of those women but I know from dating experience that it is best for me to ask someone how their feelings are concerning having kids before the relationship gets in too deep.

Honestly, I grew up with siblings that were my responsibility to watch and watching everyone else's kids at the same time, and tutoring special needs children etc. I have come to really love children and would like a few of my own (my first route WOULD be biologically for reasons having to do with the child's development) and I doubt I am the only female of my background, but most women do, in fact, want a family.

Find what you need and skip the rest, you can find yourself a woman that doesn't want kids. And yeah, it's normal not to want to commit in marriage and not to want kids, I'd imagine that most of the people at this site would agree with you. I wouldn't think less of a person for wanting kids, as I wouldn't think less of myself for it. Just keep trying, dude. You might want to look into online dating as well. I'm pretty sure most women you will meet in real life will be "brainwashed by society" as a lot of people on this website like to call people like me :P

Id still do it.. Tho I know he doesn't want kids anyways ;p Now indeed, tell us the story, tell us tell us!

I understand how you feel. I had an aversion to those things too, although I did end up getting married when I was 30.

Marriage and children are separate issues, in my mind. Marriage is a legal connection between two people who have decided to join together for the long haul. And nowadays your marriage can be defined however you and your spouse want it to - tradition is not for everyone.

You can get a divorce (after paying some heavy fees that have nothing to do with the division of assets) if your marriage fails - just like you can declare bankruptcy if your business goes under. And not all divorces end in rage and tears if the partners behave maturely about it.

Having biological children though is permanent - you can't undo that one. Not all women can or want to have them. Two of my close friends refuse to have them. I felt the same way until a two years ago when I met my nephews. Now, I'd like make a new human too - one with my DNA, that I grew inside me, but I'm getting too old so I highly doubt it's a possibility anymore. I think I'm just going to become a foster parent instead, which has been my plan since I was a teen.

I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting the things that you do out of life. I hope you can find a woman that feels the same way as you and you can be happy in life together. Having someone to share your older years with is better than being alone. And you're not a spring chicken anymore, your youth is almost behind you.