It's not about equality. Equality is derived from the word equal which means the same. I am not the same as my husband, he is a man l am a woman therefore we are different. Men and women are different in the way we think, look, dress, etc. We do not sound the same when we speak, our bodies are different shapes and women are naturally smaller and physically weaker, we even pee differently, the most basic physical action which we all do from birth. So if we are so different, why is everyone so obsessed with making men and women the same. I would not be happy to see my husband in a dress or wearing makeup and nail varnish. So if men should not be like women why should we try to be like men. I do not obey my husband because he makes me, I do it because I want to. A marriage is not a democracy, you can not have a democracy when there are only 2 people involved. When you are in total disagreement about something someone needs to back down, I will be the one to do that for the sake of my family and my marriage. It is not really a big deal, my husband respects me, he does not take advantage of his position as head of the house. I am not stupid I have a degree and work part time as a teacher. I just also happen to have old fashioned values about my home life and the meaning of marriage. The result is we are happy, arguments are few and far between, we do things together and also both have friends of our own and we have a great sex life. I put all this down to the fact we do not waste our energy on pointless arguments, holding grudges and bickering over pointless matters which probably seem important at the time and yet have little significance in the bigger scheme. Maybe more women should think this way, admittedly you need a good choice of man to do this, but do remember one thing, my man might be in charge but that doesn't mean I don't know how to influence his decisions. I am after all the woman of his dreams.
Oh come on, this has to be a troll and likely a male one at that. Equal does not mean "the same". As for the rest, get over yourself. It isn't that special to want to be lazy ass who only works part time and has someone else take care of them, under the guise of being "old-fashioned".
Whatever floats your boat but no need to get all self-righteous about it. Not everyone is as simple-minded as you.
I take it you have never been particularly involved in the housework and that is fine, as I have said neither has my husband. But please don't discredit the role of the housewife, which I do in addition to my teaching job. I don't particularly care if you think I am a troll, you are clearly uneducated if you do not know that equal means the same. That said I do take offense at being called a man. I may have old fashioned views about the role of a woman in a marriage, that does not mean I am not proud to be one.
Um, being same is not equal? Black people and white people are equal. Are they same? Each has their own culture or lifestyle they may be proud of. A handicap and fully functioning adult are not the same, but they are equal. Same with gay or straight person. Where women's flaws may be, men can make up for it and vise versa. They may be different, but they are both equally as important as each other and the world benefits from both of them.
Sounds like you’re actually a guy and this sort of thing is what you get off on. I do not see how posting about this on a site with thousands of posts about feces would magnify this feeling, unless you get off on that, too.
Actually, if that’s the case, it’s for a good reason. Both of those are really shitty things.
1.
being the same in quantity, size, degree, or value.
"add equal amounts of water and flour"
You are misunderstanding this term. This is a term with more than one meaning, as many words do. This one means equal, as in equal amount of stuff to be fair to someone. It plainly explains it here.
noun
1.
a person or thing considered to be the same as another in status or quality.
"we all treat each other as equals"
synonyms: equivalent, peer, fellow, coequal, like; More
The word here is what you are looking for. This means that the person is just as important, or that they matter just as much. It means they have the same worth or value.
Who says I am not important, my husband values my views and appreciates what I do. I never said I am treated like a servant or some form of 2nd class citizen. I do all that I do because I want to, as I mentioned before he would help if I asked but I don't ask. I am proud of my house and like to do things the way I want them done. I am also proud of my husband and want to make him happy. I obey because if we disagree over something and can't find mutual ground there are only 2 choices, to keep fighting and arguing or for one of us to concede the argument and back down. I will choose to be that person as I trust him and love him. In a work place a boss or supervisor will make the final decisions about things, doesn't mean the rest of the workforce are second class or are not important or are not respected. I think men have a greater need to be in control, it's in their competitive nature, probably something to do with testosterone levels. I don't have that need, I get far more satisfaction from making him happy than I do from winning an argument.
When people talk about equality they're almost always talking about equal rights and opportunities, so that argument of yours is just irrelevant. Marriage is a democracy, someone doesn't have to back down, you're supposed to compromise. Even if someone does have to back down occasionally, it shouldn't always be the same person. And you can't really use the claim that because "arguments are few and far between" that it's therefore a great marriage, when the reason that arguments are few and far between is because you don't even consider your arguments as worthy. Just because you're submitting your point of view into an argument doesn't mean it has to be a hostile argument. By refusing to argue your own points as equal to his just because you're afraid of starting a big argument, you're just letting yourself down.
I do consider my arguments worthy, that is the very reason we have the occasional argument, but as I have previously stated someone has to make the final decision. I am happy to let my husband be that person, maybe you consider that wrong and maybe you feel you could not live that way. But I have been married over 20 years and we are both happy, so be it right or wrong it seems to be working quite well.
IIN to have old fashioned views about male and female roles
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It's not about equality. Equality is derived from the word equal which means the same. I am not the same as my husband, he is a man l am a woman therefore we are different. Men and women are different in the way we think, look, dress, etc. We do not sound the same when we speak, our bodies are different shapes and women are naturally smaller and physically weaker, we even pee differently, the most basic physical action which we all do from birth. So if we are so different, why is everyone so obsessed with making men and women the same. I would not be happy to see my husband in a dress or wearing makeup and nail varnish. So if men should not be like women why should we try to be like men. I do not obey my husband because he makes me, I do it because I want to. A marriage is not a democracy, you can not have a democracy when there are only 2 people involved. When you are in total disagreement about something someone needs to back down, I will be the one to do that for the sake of my family and my marriage. It is not really a big deal, my husband respects me, he does not take advantage of his position as head of the house. I am not stupid I have a degree and work part time as a teacher. I just also happen to have old fashioned values about my home life and the meaning of marriage. The result is we are happy, arguments are few and far between, we do things together and also both have friends of our own and we have a great sex life. I put all this down to the fact we do not waste our energy on pointless arguments, holding grudges and bickering over pointless matters which probably seem important at the time and yet have little significance in the bigger scheme. Maybe more women should think this way, admittedly you need a good choice of man to do this, but do remember one thing, my man might be in charge but that doesn't mean I don't know how to influence his decisions. I am after all the woman of his dreams.
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Oh come on, this has to be a troll and likely a male one at that. Equal does not mean "the same". As for the rest, get over yourself. It isn't that special to want to be lazy ass who only works part time and has someone else take care of them, under the guise of being "old-fashioned".
Whatever floats your boat but no need to get all self-righteous about it. Not everyone is as simple-minded as you.
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I take it you have never been particularly involved in the housework and that is fine, as I have said neither has my husband. But please don't discredit the role of the housewife, which I do in addition to my teaching job. I don't particularly care if you think I am a troll, you are clearly uneducated if you do not know that equal means the same. That said I do take offense at being called a man. I may have old fashioned views about the role of a woman in a marriage, that does not mean I am not proud to be one.
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Um, being same is not equal? Black people and white people are equal. Are they same? Each has their own culture or lifestyle they may be proud of. A handicap and fully functioning adult are not the same, but they are equal. Same with gay or straight person. Where women's flaws may be, men can make up for it and vise versa. They may be different, but they are both equally as important as each other and the world benefits from both of them.
Troll harder man.
Sounds like you’re actually a guy and this sort of thing is what you get off on. I do not see how posting about this on a site with thousands of posts about feces would magnify this feeling, unless you get off on that, too.
Actually, if that’s the case, it’s for a good reason. Both of those are really shitty things.
1.
being the same in quantity, size, degree, or value.
"add equal amounts of water and flour"
You are misunderstanding this term. This is a term with more than one meaning, as many words do. This one means equal, as in equal amount of stuff to be fair to someone. It plainly explains it here.
noun
1.
a person or thing considered to be the same as another in status or quality.
"we all treat each other as equals"
synonyms: equivalent, peer, fellow, coequal, like; More
The word here is what you are looking for. This means that the person is just as important, or that they matter just as much. It means they have the same worth or value.
It has nothing to do with same.
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Who says I am not important, my husband values my views and appreciates what I do. I never said I am treated like a servant or some form of 2nd class citizen. I do all that I do because I want to, as I mentioned before he would help if I asked but I don't ask. I am proud of my house and like to do things the way I want them done. I am also proud of my husband and want to make him happy. I obey because if we disagree over something and can't find mutual ground there are only 2 choices, to keep fighting and arguing or for one of us to concede the argument and back down. I will choose to be that person as I trust him and love him. In a work place a boss or supervisor will make the final decisions about things, doesn't mean the rest of the workforce are second class or are not important or are not respected. I think men have a greater need to be in control, it's in their competitive nature, probably something to do with testosterone levels. I don't have that need, I get far more satisfaction from making him happy than I do from winning an argument.
When people talk about equality they're almost always talking about equal rights and opportunities, so that argument of yours is just irrelevant. Marriage is a democracy, someone doesn't have to back down, you're supposed to compromise. Even if someone does have to back down occasionally, it shouldn't always be the same person. And you can't really use the claim that because "arguments are few and far between" that it's therefore a great marriage, when the reason that arguments are few and far between is because you don't even consider your arguments as worthy. Just because you're submitting your point of view into an argument doesn't mean it has to be a hostile argument. By refusing to argue your own points as equal to his just because you're afraid of starting a big argument, you're just letting yourself down.
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I do consider my arguments worthy, that is the very reason we have the occasional argument, but as I have previously stated someone has to make the final decision. I am happy to let my husband be that person, maybe you consider that wrong and maybe you feel you could not live that way. But I have been married over 20 years and we are both happy, so be it right or wrong it seems to be working quite well.
Not everyone appreciates your views, but I don't see why you should be getting thumbed down so much.
You're really not an idiot, and you had the sense to mention that you'd essentially need a good man who wouldn't abuse his authority.
Amen!