What you say suggests to me that your father is a narcissist. Such people are very good at manipulating others, which may be part of the reason your mother stuck with him for as long as she did.
Nothing that a narcissist says should be taken at face value. Everything they say is calculated - consciously or unconsciously - to manipulate others in order to get what they want. I suspect your father is now missing some aspect of living with his family, and he's putting subtle pressure on you and your sister to recruit you to work on his behalf against your mother.
Your sympathy is laudable, but I think it's misguided and undeserved. The only one you should be feeling sorry for is your mother, and you should be focused on supporting her in whatever way you can. I would not be surprised at all if you eventually discover that, unknown to you, your father has been doing his best to push her buttons and manipulate her into letting him back in to the family home.
I've never come across that before. Narcissism can manifest in various forms, but I suspect that's really a very good rough and ready test. My mother-in-law is a narcissist, and I'm sure she'd flatly assert that she doesn't need to change or improve herself since she's totally happy with how she is.
Can you imagine the response of The Greatest Ever Donald to that question?
The same YouTuber has a longer video on other things that narcissists commonly instinctively do, one of which is to use word-salad to essentially hypnotise others in order to implant suggestions and manipulate them. Listening to that, I was reminded of reading a verbatim transcript of what Trump said at one of his rallies. It made absolutely no sense whatever, but it might go some way towards explaining the baying of the yahoos at those rallies.
I first saw this video while I was still with my verbally, and emotionally abusive ex-boyfriend. I asked him the question, and initially it seemed to kinda just stump him, and he just got progressively more angry and rageful after being asked in what ways he could improve.
I honestly try not to think of politicians very much, because for me it's always just a choice between a douche and a turd. I just vote for whomever I find to be the lesser of two evils. Usually I've got too much personal crap going on to think too much about politicians, celebrities, or reality stars. My sister drives me crazy telling me that she likes to watch the Real Housewives on BRAVO, because she thinks she can learn from them. Ugh.
I'm actually subscribed to Richard Grannon's channel, because I really feel like I can benefit from its content. I love the part in the video about Bladerunner! There's always something about narcissists where they are very flat spiritually, and lack depth. I was gonna say that there is is very shallow quality to them, but it just feels so redundant to me to say. It's hard to have a deep conversation with a narcissist, because they seem to focus on very superficial details, as if they're almost learning disabled, it's very weird. There's a flatness about them.
Okay that's enough of my stream of consciousness rant.
Gee Rosie, and you were just warming up. Tbh, your social perceptions of people unlike yourself can be a bit of a roadmap for me. Remember that social exposure begets social insight. I'm just an unsocialized dork that filled whiteboards with algebra to get systems working to neutralize targets, and make markets. I'm sorry that my life experience contains nothing useful for you, but please know that I appreciate the way you share your insights about people.
Well, at least you are a dirty old man who understands about narcissists! They are awful the way they abuse people, but then turn it all around, and act like victims.
Why do you say he is a narcissist? Because he cheated on his wife? Tons of people do this. Doesnt mean hes recruiting his daughter "to work against the mother". You're making too many assumptions.
Psychological studies have found a correlation between narcissism and promiscuity. The narcissist currently occupying the White House (between rounds of golf) is a very obvious example.
If you want a cite: https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/darwins-subterranean-world/201806/the-promiscuous-narcissist
Of course I was suggesting a label based on very limited information, but the behaviour the OP describes is consistent with that of a narcissist.
He does brag a lot but it's hilarious because of how angry he makes people just by being himself. The other week he passed this prison reform bill and had former inmates at the White House talking about how great Trump is for releasing them and you see Trump over there with a huge smile on his face and you know liberals are exploding over Trump getting his ego stroked. He's HILARIOUS.
IIN to feel bad for my dad
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What you say suggests to me that your father is a narcissist. Such people are very good at manipulating others, which may be part of the reason your mother stuck with him for as long as she did.
Nothing that a narcissist says should be taken at face value. Everything they say is calculated - consciously or unconsciously - to manipulate others in order to get what they want. I suspect your father is now missing some aspect of living with his family, and he's putting subtle pressure on you and your sister to recruit you to work on his behalf against your mother.
Your sympathy is laudable, but I think it's misguided and undeserved. The only one you should be feeling sorry for is your mother, and you should be focused on supporting her in whatever way you can. I would not be surprised at all if you eventually discover that, unknown to you, your father has been doing his best to push her buttons and manipulate her into letting him back in to the family home.
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RoseIsabella
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RoseIsabella
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https://youtu.be/tW5rXvFXQxY
Check out this video, and please tell me what you think. I love this video!
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I've never come across that before. Narcissism can manifest in various forms, but I suspect that's really a very good rough and ready test. My mother-in-law is a narcissist, and I'm sure she'd flatly assert that she doesn't need to change or improve herself since she's totally happy with how she is.
Can you imagine the response of The Greatest Ever Donald to that question?
The same YouTuber has a longer video on other things that narcissists commonly instinctively do, one of which is to use word-salad to essentially hypnotise others in order to implant suggestions and manipulate them. Listening to that, I was reminded of reading a verbatim transcript of what Trump said at one of his rallies. It made absolutely no sense whatever, but it might go some way towards explaining the baying of the yahoos at those rallies.
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RoseIsabella
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I first saw this video while I was still with my verbally, and emotionally abusive ex-boyfriend. I asked him the question, and initially it seemed to kinda just stump him, and he just got progressively more angry and rageful after being asked in what ways he could improve.
I honestly try not to think of politicians very much, because for me it's always just a choice between a douche and a turd. I just vote for whomever I find to be the lesser of two evils. Usually I've got too much personal crap going on to think too much about politicians, celebrities, or reality stars. My sister drives me crazy telling me that she likes to watch the Real Housewives on BRAVO, because she thinks she can learn from them. Ugh.
I'm actually subscribed to Richard Grannon's channel, because I really feel like I can benefit from its content. I love the part in the video about Bladerunner! There's always something about narcissists where they are very flat spiritually, and lack depth. I was gonna say that there is is very shallow quality to them, but it just feels so redundant to me to say. It's hard to have a deep conversation with a narcissist, because they seem to focus on very superficial details, as if they're almost learning disabled, it's very weird. There's a flatness about them.
Okay that's enough of my stream of consciousness rant.
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Gee Rosie, and you were just warming up. Tbh, your social perceptions of people unlike yourself can be a bit of a roadmap for me. Remember that social exposure begets social insight. I'm just an unsocialized dork that filled whiteboards with algebra to get systems working to neutralize targets, and make markets. I'm sorry that my life experience contains nothing useful for you, but please know that I appreciate the way you share your insights about people.
Thank you. 💛
Boojum, out of curiosity, are you a man or a woman?
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Boojum
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Just another dirty old man.
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RoseIsabella
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You should have said, "I am a woman who likes to deprive incels of sex".
You know how many of those silly incels are on here, longing for some poon tang that will never come.
Well, at least you are a dirty old man who understands about narcissists! They are awful the way they abuse people, but then turn it all around, and act like victims.
Why do you say he is a narcissist? Because he cheated on his wife? Tons of people do this. Doesnt mean hes recruiting his daughter "to work against the mother". You're making too many assumptions.
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Boojum
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Psychological studies have found a correlation between narcissism and promiscuity. The narcissist currently occupying the White House (between rounds of golf) is a very obvious example.
If you want a cite: https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/darwins-subterranean-world/201806/the-promiscuous-narcissist
Of course I was suggesting a label based on very limited information, but the behaviour the OP describes is consistent with that of a narcissist.
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WeirdManFromTheSouth
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Lol in true liberal fashion you threw Trump in there too.
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Boojum
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Well, he keeps telling everyone how he's the greatest, and in this case he's certainly a very good example.
And, yeah, I expected you to rise to that bait, so it was a little trollish of me.
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He does brag a lot but it's hilarious because of how angry he makes people just by being himself. The other week he passed this prison reform bill and had former inmates at the White House talking about how great Trump is for releasing them and you see Trump over there with a huge smile on his face and you know liberals are exploding over Trump getting his ego stroked. He's HILARIOUS.
BRAVO!