Is it normal to catch your son?

My son, who is 10, I caight him humping a teddy bear and moaning, he didn't notice. Later, I looked at the teddy bear and there was a hold cut where his thingnwould fit into. Iin? Should I memtion it to him?

Is It Normal?
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  • If he didn't notice you shouldn't mention it. But you should have a talk with him about puberty and the bodily changes and the feelings that go with it. If you can broach the subject, reassure him that masturbation is normal.

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  • All kids do all sorts of weird shit. Boys do really weird shit with their penises while they're trying to figure stuff out. Unless parents never give their kids a moment of privacy (or the kid has serious boundary and social skills problems), parents don't know half the shit their kids get up to.

    'Twas ever thus.

    On the grand scale of weirdness, I think this rates pretty low. Presumably the teddy bear had no real monetary value, so it's not like he's screwed up (😁) something that will cost a lot to repair. And it's not like what he did is going to cause him any physical harm - unlike some of the really, really stupid experiments some boys perform on their penis.

    As a parent myself, I think the one thing I'd be concerned about is where he's getting his information about sex. He's obviously reached the age where he's very interested, so it's possible he's hearing all sorts of complete BS from his peers and picking up all sorts of really problematic ideas online.

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    • He's only 10 though

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      • And...?

        It's more than half a century since I was your son's age, but I clearly remember an older neighbourhood boy explaining what jerking off was (strictly by mime, so nothing too weird). That happened during the summer vacation following me finishing sixth grade, so I would have been about the same age as your son is now. But prior to that, I'd been fiddling around with my penis for years.

        It does seem strange to me how many people these days apparently want to believe that children are completely naïve, asexual beings until one minute past midnight on their birthday when they reach the age of local consent. Kids have always been curious, and some kids start masturbating when they're much younger than ten.

        You son lives in a world where he's surrounded by pictures, videos and real-world women showing a lot of skin and leaving not a great deal about their bodies to his imagination. The odds are very good that he won't have to think too hard to fill in the blanks, because he will have learned the details of female anatomy from somewhere.

        I do think parents need to be concerned about the early sexualisation of their children, but unless you want to keep him locked up in the cellar, he is going to be exposed to this stuff. Over the next few years, his body is going to go through some major physical and hormonal changes. You would be wise to start thinking about how you can talk to him about sex in terms that are clear to him, but age-appropriate and don't leave him cringing in embarrassment. If nothing else, tactfully point him towards good quality sex-education websites aimed at young people, such as https://www.scarleteen.com/

        If you leave him entirely to his own devices, he's likely to pick up all sorts of stupid, nasty ideas from his peers, some of whom may well come from families where sexual abuse is going on, and others who will believe that what they see in porn is how sex should be.

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  • Buy him a blow up doll with a tube of lube for his fourteenth birthday. He will be past puberty by then.

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  • He’s not the first boy to do that, comedian Greg Davis even mentioned it in one of his shows. I don’t see what would be achieved by revealing that you know about his “special relationship” with this teddy but I agree with Boojum that you should make sure he is being educated properly on puberty, sex and consent. Perhaps get him a book on it if you haven’t already?

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  • My son is ten and I couldn’t imagine him being that clever in regards to something for him to rub his Peter on. Lol. Do y’all monitor what he watches?

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  • He is a kid he's still young. Everyone has done weird stuff as a kid, you could if you wish but don't blame us if he feels humiliated.

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  • Put needles or razor blades in the hole.

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  • Probably felt good 👍

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  • If he enjoys putting his thingnwould into that hold let him be. Hes not hurting anyone. Also dont say anything you could damage him for the rest of his life as regards to his attitudes towards sex.

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  • I think that your child may need to see a psychologist, as he may suffer from a sexual mental illness. On the otherhand, he may not know any better.
    Either way, you should sit down and talk with him. Don't get angry, and try to be understanding.

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    • What utter bullshit.

      I can think of several reasons why you might be so screwed up about sex or so completely ignorant about child sexual development that you honestly believe what you say, but your opinion that the OP's son has a "sexual mental illness" is bollocks.

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    • A sexual mental illness? Most kids do crap like that when they're that age.

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  • What's exactly the point of confronting him? If he just come up with doing that naturally on his own i see no harm. If you aren't trying to teach him something actually useful or important regarding it I think you should just ignore it, but its your choice.

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  • Buy him a box of condoms tell him to put some shampoo in it and go use the shower. He'll think your the best later

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  • What's his "thing"?

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    • Good point. The OP's use of that childish euphemism possibly says a lot about how matters relating to sex are treated in the family.

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  • Here we go again

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