Is it normal to be proud to be a virgin?

I'm a virgin and I want to stay that way. I'm just proud to be one. I don't really have a reason why. Don't take this the wrong way, I don't think I'm better than anyone who lost theirs. I'm a guy. IIN?

Voting Results
86% Normal
Based on 36 votes (31 yes)
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Comments ( 28 )
  • Carlton03

    I’m not sure if it’s anything to be proud of but if it’s something that is imprortant to you or that doesn’t bother you then yes that part is normal but I’m not sure if being proud of it is, that’s just my two cents, it is definitely NOT something that people should be teased or ostracised for.

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  • Grunewald

    I'm proud to be a virgin too! I'm a girl, 27 yo, nearly 28. Don't you think there ought to be a 'virgin pride' since we're such an oddity, and game to disparaging remarks and attitudes? Before anyone starts with the 'you're not oppressed' thing, you only need to watch '40 year old virgin' and you'll see that the assumption virginity = bad is pretty mainstream. It's not at the level of 'death to all virgins' or a brick through the window, but it's still enough to make you feel afraid to admit the truth about yourself and to make you feel ashamed of something that isn't intrinsically shameful.

    I don't know about you but it upsets me that I'm shamed or regarded as 'weird' for preserving myself. If thinking of people who label themselves gay or transgender as 'weird' is treated like some kind of thought crime, where ought that leave virgins? The only reason adult virgins are not considered a 'minority demographic' as such is that we don't fight for the right to be recognised. Oh, and the whole thing about the promotion of virginity in the 'bad old days of patriarchy', and nothing that was protected then can be protected now because THE PEOPLE ON THE RIGHT SIDE OF HISTORY SAY SO. The summer of 68 that was basically the origin of a HUGE proportion of sexual values today was about everything that WASN'T virginity; perhaps it was even anti-virginity. The SJWs would thus be undermining their values and roots to defend virgins.

    Still, that doesn't prevent us being us, and it doesn't invalidate the fact that prejudice hurts us. While I was a student, I was much more 'loud and proud' than I am now, and got harrassed by guys making repeated, disgusting propositions for sex. Figure why I'm a 'shy' virgin now. It feels rotten having to 'hide' for fear of being disparaged at work or by my entourage. Even if I no longer fear sexual harrassment, I've still had to be wary of 'she's weird', 'there must be something wrong with her', 'I bet she's into hardcore porn' 'she just HAS to be a closet lesbian' or 'Oh she's just a child that hasn't grown up; she'll learn one day'. And not being included in social stuff as a result. Which of course is where you pick up plum projects if you're in a female-dominated workplace.

    We should be able to be loud and proud just like anyone else, and prejudice and harrassment should be looked upon as unacceptable just like it is for everyone else. I dearly want to marry a man who is a virgin.

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    • Algum

      I agree. I am a 42 year old asexual and I am not the slightest bit ashamed of it, no matter how many people try to tell me I should be. I am not going to listen to any "shoulds" from anyone unless it's the law, and last time I checked, it ain't illegal to be celibate.

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    • You're repressing yourself and will regret it later.

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    • Carlton03

      Oh wow that’s good that you are waiting, in a lot of cases the ones who tease others about it are mean for starters and probably wish they would have waited themselves or were able to exercise self control etc, I have had many comments like that over the years, not that people particularly know if you are or aren’t, they just assume and make comments to randoms, yeah they just make assumptions and think things like you listed above, in my experiences the ones who go around talking and promoting some sort of sex fueled lifestyle as a priority or think that random sex and sleeping around is some sort of necessity cause they are “young” are generally losers and have nothing else then that lifestyle and have many other bad habits too, they barely have any money or savings and just scrape through from pay cheque to pay cheque and probably don’t have much of a future, you know what I mean? Let me know if you want some examples please, yeah that movie bags the hell out of them and adds to the negative connotation of the topic, I have seen it, it’s pretty funny some of the jokes though and it’s just a movie so yeah. I’m glad you rejected those pigs who approached you for sex, I can tell you know you are more grown up than the ones who sleep around reguarly are and probably will ever be. Good luck finding someone for you. :-)

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    • Countess_Kittycat

      Great post! I think celibacy, virginity and even asexuality are more accepted among Catholics, though ironically more so by traditionalists. I think you were right on point in attributing that general lack of acceptance or understanding to the sexual revolution of the sixties. Its conquests are all well and good, but, right now, a deeper appreciation for non-sexual identity is in deep want as well, not only for the good of traditionalists, but for that of everyone.

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  • Puppetmorty

    I'm asexual, and also proud of being a virgin. And I am proud of YOU for being proud of being a virgin.

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  • McBean

    You're a little bit sick. Without sexual experience you will never become a developed person. That said, you should be looking for the right person.

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    • Countess_Kittycat

      How does sex make you "developed"? And why is it needed for it? Sounds like nonsense.

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      • McBean

        Good question. Actually, I was thinking of the intimacy vs isolation phase of Erikson's model of psycho-social development [more details on Wikipedia]. True intimacy is far more than just a sexual relationship. But, it is hard to imagine a functional marriage with deep mutual understanding between partners without it. Hopefully, the OP is young and will someday attain this developmental level of maturity.

        You commented saying that I have reacted to something I don't understand. Could you give all of us more details? My ego can take it.

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        • Countess_Kittycat

          Virgin life is possible in full splendor, even in marriage. It's very common among people who identify as asexual or in certain Christian communities. It is not possible only for them, though. I would argue sex does not help in any way in mutual understanding, though the simple pleasure a sexual individual gains from sex may be, in my view, a motivation to stay in a relationship per itself, whether there is any understanding between the parts at all. While I would agree that a marriage without sex is hard to imagine for most people, I believe it is so only because it's both uncommon and, after the sixties, like Ruth mentioned, not entirely in accordance with the values and aspirations most people hold. That's what I meant by something you don't understand, I was just surmising this kind of life would sound counterintuitive to you. I did not mean it as an offense, though my tone in the rest was kind of offensive. What really irked me was you labeling him as sick because of his lifestyle and personal feelings, which are completely ok. I would also go further than earlier in the post, though, and say that married people are not superior in any way to single people, and some single people are extremely happy and realized, while married people quite often are not. Probably also counterintuitive in our culture, that seems to consider relationships a badge of honor, but true nonetheless. Even if the OP's author stays virgin for the rest of his life, he can still be a fully realized individual, and no one can say he is sick or less developed for keeping his lifestyle.

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          • McBean

            I'm intrigued by your provocative defense of the single lifestyle. I also think it may be achieveable by certain asexual individuals. . To acknowledge my personal biases, I am a crusty fuck wise ass. As such, I tend to think sexual activity is irresistible. In other words, Catholic priests stick their dicks into little boy's butts, Catholic nuns lick and suck each other while bound in leather straps, and college professors give grade adjustments to desperate female whores. Human reproduction is assured because low sex drive has been eliminated from the gene pool by Darwinian selection.

            Of course exceptions exist. But, I do not have the type of personality that these exceptional people would find pleasant. Hence, my under estimation of their existence. Please continue with your thoughtful, insightful, and well argued viewpoints.

            To all a good night, and to all a good wank.

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    • That's your opinion. Don't make it sound like fact.

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      • McBean

        That's right buddy, I supported this opinion with standard arguments. Since your pride is based on a different opinion, perhaps you could give us your supporting argumentation. At this point all we know is that you don't fuck, and probably you wank to Internet porn.

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        • Countess_Kittycat

          So your reaction to something you don't understand is to believe it has been secretly like you all along? Well, sex does not seem to be doing wonders for you.

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        • You didn't support anything, actually. Literally nothing you said was a fact. But keep thinking every opinion you have is a fact. It's not my business to help delusionals.

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          • McBean

            I don't think my opinions are fact. Nor does it bother me that your opinions are different than mine.

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  • e51pegasi

    You are proud to be a virgin, congratulations.

    The only people that are really interested in the fact that you haven't popped your cherry are you & the morons that want to take the piss.

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    • I know that. It's not like I go around telling everyone I am one. It's an introspective thing. It only has to do with me and what I noticed I feel.

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    • Grunewald

      Would you say that about a person who was proud to call themselves gay?

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      • e51pegasi

        Actually yes. I see people not a sexuality.

        Should I be proud I'm working class? Or straight? Or the fact that I wear glasses? Or the fact that I'm vegetarian?

        Nope, because noone really cares.

        I have no interest in someones sexuality or their sex life.

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        • Grunewald

          Well, I wish more people did just see people.

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  • lordofopinions

    You're a virgin at your age? Too bad. You're missing out on a lot of orgasms. Do you masturbate? If yes then technically you're not a virgin. Go and get laid.

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    • You don't know my age. It's not uncommon to be at my age either. Technically and not technically I'm a virgin.

      vir·gin
      ˈvərjən/Submit
      noun
      1.
      a person who has never had sexual intercourse.

      sex·u·al in·ter·course
      ˈsekSH(o͞o)əl ˈin(t)ərˌkôrs/Submit
      noun
      sexual contact between individuals involving penetration, especially the insertion of a man's erect penis into a woman's vagina, typically culminating in orgasm and the ejaculation of semen.

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  • LionsMane

    That's great. Our world is over-sexualized. I don't know how old you are but our youth is losing their virginity younger and younger. It's sad.

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  • MrDexter

    Yes

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  • Countess_Kittycat

    Yes, I sincerely believe it's completely normal. There are many incredible sides to being a virgin, and it has been a major component of Catholic culture and devotion for centuries. While I don't believe anymore in many of the theological arguments for it or for the evil of sexual experience, I still believe being a virgin and enjoying it is an awesome part of life, and I don't reject at all the positive elements (as perceived by me) of our Marian devotion that are still compatible with my present views. Sometimes I would even like to be a virgin again, so I could enjoy that phase of my life once more. My reasons for feeling like this may even be influenced by my Catholic past, but I'm entirely of the opinion you can also feel like this for completely different, non-religious reasons. I really don't see why it would not be normal, despite what anyone else thinks.

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    • MissileExpert

      The best way to become a virgin mother is to visit the sperm bank. I'm predicting you will be making a withdrawal very soon.

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