Thanks so much for sharing your views. (As a female I am really saddened to hear your experience was so emotionally hurtful and disconnecting). You are right though - we do need to figure out what works for us. If only he would communicate on the subject instead of making me feel weird for asking.
I think anything 2 people want together is ok I don't judge anyone on that tho sometimes I wonder what makes them want it usually like the flogging or real rough stuff. I am so bad at relationships you should never ever listen if it sounds like I'm giving advice becos for sure it will kill whatever you have I'm toxic like that. But maybe if you can talk about it outside the bedroom and tell him why you want it and how it would make you feel hopefully theres something really positive about it and you can make that the point. I don't think a trade system would work where you do this for me I do that for you cos then you have to keep score and I think keeping score is a bad road to go down.
If I can ask what do you want him to say or express? Maybe I can think of a way to put it that will put him at ease. I'm thinking he probably puts you in a special place in his heart and that what you want isn't compatible with that.
IIN to ask him to talk dirty?
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Thanks so much for sharing your views. (As a female I am really saddened to hear your experience was so emotionally hurtful and disconnecting). You are right though - we do need to figure out what works for us. If only he would communicate on the subject instead of making me feel weird for asking.
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mysistersshadow
7 years ago
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I think anything 2 people want together is ok I don't judge anyone on that tho sometimes I wonder what makes them want it usually like the flogging or real rough stuff. I am so bad at relationships you should never ever listen if it sounds like I'm giving advice becos for sure it will kill whatever you have I'm toxic like that. But maybe if you can talk about it outside the bedroom and tell him why you want it and how it would make you feel hopefully theres something really positive about it and you can make that the point. I don't think a trade system would work where you do this for me I do that for you cos then you have to keep score and I think keeping score is a bad road to go down.
If I can ask what do you want him to say or express? Maybe I can think of a way to put it that will put him at ease. I'm thinking he probably puts you in a special place in his heart and that what you want isn't compatible with that.