Is it normal that when i'm in a happy moment everyone thinks i have a big ego?
Just when I start to think, "YES! I can finally be myself! I'm not in High School anymore, I'm on my own. I can be myself!", somebody has to come along and make it seem like, "Oh whoa look at that girl. She must think that shes hot shit or something..." She thinks, "OHHH I'm soooo hott!"
I like to do my own thing. I've had depression for a long time and I used to speak to someone about it, unfortunately, don't anymore. I rarely ever feel happy, so when I finally do have that moment where I'm happy, I feel on top of the fucking world! And moments like those don't come often for me, so I pretty much soak it in. But not in a way thats like, "I'm so awesome!", it's kinda like, "Yes! Right at this very moment I actually feel happy. And I'm by myself, so I can be weird, and crazy and loud without someone judging me." Yet, everyone else seems to want to tear me down.
Well, the problem is, people seem to think I'm "into myself" everytime I'm just trying to have some fun. The only alone time I really have is in my car driving to and from work. Usually then is when I feel like I can actually breathe gracefully without being looked at like I should jump off a cliff and die or something. So I take advantage of my alone time. Sometimes I hear a song on the radio, and I feel like blasting it just because I'm "in that kind of mood". But I never realized I was offending anyone until someone said that "I" thought I was, "oh....so hot!".
It really bothered me because its not like I'm putting anybody down. I'm just minding my own business, listening to my music, having some fun, and suddenly, I'm a bitch who thinks her shit don't stink! Today, I heard someone at my work who, I don't even know, mumble under their breath that I'm a whore. I don't even know this girl/woman. I just had to deliver something to her area. As I walked away I distinctly heard, "Whore!" and it was clearly directed at me. Funny thing is, that I don't do shit with guys/anyone! I'm still a virgin. Every guy who asked me out I said no to. I do nothing with the opposite sex, and that makes me a whore?