Is it normal that my parents feel guilty about how they raised me now that im adult

67% Normal
7 Comments

Is it normal for my parents to bring up all the negative things they did while raising me, mentioning how bad they feel about it? It just makes me feel way worse. I would not say they were abusive as it was all unintentional, caused by their own mental conditions. I am not bothered by it, I just feel bad that they are. Are all parents like this?

Voting Results
67% Normal
Based on 6 votes (4 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • RoseIsabella
    6 years ago

    Good for them for being accountable for their actions. If you want to help your folks then simply tell them that you love them and forgive them.

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    • Ellenna
      6 years ago

      Yep, spot on! Most parents pretend they're perfect and you're incredibly lucky to have parents who know they weren't.

      Tell them kindly that they don't need to keep apologising, that you forgive them and love them right now.

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      • RoseIsabella
        6 years ago

        Thanks, Ellenna! I'm moving back in with my folks to a place where I've never been, and to be honest I just want us to get along, because my dad is 80 and my mom is in her late 70s. I have certain resentments that I would love to work through with them, particularly my mother, but they would rather that I just drop the matter, and move on with my life. I think OP is really lucky that he has parents that are remorseful for whatever wrongs they may have done.

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  • Nickvey
    6 years ago

    my parents like to spoil my kids, they say its because they couldnt spoil me but the deep secrete is my mother abused me. she was mental and addicted to nicotine second hand smoke . when she could not get a fix it drove her up the wall and she had an outlet. Me , she would beat me because i would never tell on her. she enjoyed beating me. it gave her sadistic joy. had to get my head sewn up twice my chin , my elbow . oddly she never broke a bone. do i forgive her? dont have to . whats to forgive. we both survived it. Its just them compensating for the errors they made in the past. Let it go . its just the method they have chose to deal with it.

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  • sissycakes
    6 years ago

    Who knows? My parents cannot remember anything it seems.

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  • AntiArchon
    6 years ago

    do you think they're genuinely sorry or they're just worried you won't take care of them when they get really old?

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  • Tealights
    6 years ago

    Yeah, because hindsight is 20/20 and they're getting old.

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