Is it normal that im terrible at helping friends

i find it difficult to genuinely care about my friends and give them useful advice, if someone comes to me about a tragedy in their life im trying really really hard to help them emotionally but i can tell that im not as genuine as i should be and this bothers me.

Voting Results
100% Normal
Based on 11 votes
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 6 )
  • my_life_my_way

    Just learn a few set phrases to say in these situations that seem comforting and nice. You’re probably doing okay really and no one is noticing that you’re not quite genuine.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Mark92

    Do whatever you can to help them, as they say "a friend in need is a friend indeed".

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Tommythecaty

    I find it difficult to genuinely care about caring, but that’s because I care so much.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • SkullsNRoses

    I struggle with this too, I’m terrible at consoling people. Like you I worry that I don’t seem genuine and to be honest sometimes when it’s an ongoing drama I get bored and just nod like a head-bobbing dog toy and say “mm” a lot.

    As my_life_my_way says learn some set phrases to pull out, I personally say “I’m so sorry” and “Jesus Christ” a lot.

    What I would say to you is that a lot of people (especially women I’ve noticed) don’t so much want advice but just to tell someone their problems. A lot of the time in these situations just listening to them is enough.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • ellnell

    Yeah I suck at this too, yet my friends always comes to me for advice or support. They can probably sense that I really do care but I just suck at expressing it as well as I want to.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Cliche1234

    Not sure about how you exactly feel but I can kinda relate to this. However, I am actually sincere on trying to help my friend. It's just that I suck at giving advice and responding to their sad stories which gives me this feeling that I am faking myself at trying to be concerned about them. Though deep down, I know I actually care and trying my best to lift their sadness. Perhaps you actually sorta feel like I do here too, OP?

    Comment Hidden ( show )