"Love" isn't what you think it is. It's not just the fun, heart-racing feelings you get from the chemistry in your brain. A marriage that is built on those feeling is doomed to fail because those feelings quickly fade away.
When people say things like "he would make a great husband" or they are giving thought to spending the rest of their life with him, that strikes me as a better gauge of how "in love" they are than those fleeting feelings.
Perhaps I didn't explain myself clearly enough. I never said marriage should be built on feelings of infatuation. In fact, if you re-read my post, you'll note that I said that compatibile personalities and beliefs are essential to a good marriage. But for most people, having some level of physical attraction to their partner is also important to a good relationship. Of course, those heart-racing feelings you're talking about will fade, but they should not go away completely. I have been in a committed relationship for six years, and there are definitely times when my partner can still make my heart race just like the early days.
IIN that I would marry my friend but I don't have a crush on him?
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"Love" isn't what you think it is. It's not just the fun, heart-racing feelings you get from the chemistry in your brain. A marriage that is built on those feeling is doomed to fail because those feelings quickly fade away.
When people say things like "he would make a great husband" or they are giving thought to spending the rest of their life with him, that strikes me as a better gauge of how "in love" they are than those fleeting feelings.
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forever_anon
10 years ago
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Perhaps I didn't explain myself clearly enough. I never said marriage should be built on feelings of infatuation. In fact, if you re-read my post, you'll note that I said that compatibile personalities and beliefs are essential to a good marriage. But for most people, having some level of physical attraction to their partner is also important to a good relationship. Of course, those heart-racing feelings you're talking about will fade, but they should not go away completely. I have been in a committed relationship for six years, and there are definitely times when my partner can still make my heart race just like the early days.