Is it normal that i never got over my miscarrige

83% Normal
4 Comments

hi
i am 19 yrs old now but in when i was 17 i found out i was prego n at first i was scared which is normal but then it hit me ima be a mom and it was the most exciting thing in my life i had a boyfriend that was all in and a family that backed me up 100 and 10 percent it was perfect i knew right away i was gunna keep the baby i was already thinking of baby names i know i was young and i knew it was going to be really hard and i would never have a normal teenage life again but i was willing to give it all up for my little baby and suddely i realized all of that dint matter anymore not the gossip i no longer wanted to know who was going out with who all i cared about was my baby and how much i wanted to hold him or her and tell him or her that i love him or her with all my heart and i will never let anything or anyone to hurt him or her but i never got that chance i went to my first obgyn appointment and they could really tell me much cuz i was only a couple of weeks but they gave me a pic and said there it is i looked my bf made fun cuz he could see it but i knew it was ther and him or her was growing inside of me and it was my responsiblity to take care or him or her well then my next appointment was when i was 2 in half months it was the time where i would hear my baby heart the doc put the cold jelly on my belly n put the machine up to my tummy moved it around to find the heart beat but.... silence nothing my heart dropped in that instant i knew i could breath i was filled with so many emotion i hated my bf for getting me prego and i blamed him for my pain then the doc said well now we have to make an appointment to have the baby taken out and i couldnt bare it i just br0oke down i couldnt belive this was happening i still cant belive it happened im not over it im scared to get prego again becuz i dont want to feel the pain all over again ALL I WANTED WAS TO HOLD ME BABY but i will never get that chance my heart will never heal from this pain but i pretnened and hide form the truth for a long time but it still eats me up inside i dont think i could ever move on i dont think my life will ever be the same

Is It Normal?
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  • Box
    10 years ago | pl

    I would very much like to know how you are doing now, if you ever get this :)

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  • vladimirzharkov
    12 years ago | pl

    It's not your boyfriend's 'fault though.

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  • aussiewolf
    12 years ago | pl

    i understand completely. my husband and i tried for nearly 2 years to get pregnant then when we finally got pregnant, we lost it a few months in. it took me a couple of years and a lot of therapy but i have finally been able to move on.
    i constantly blamed myself and thought about what else i could have done to save the baby and of course none of that helped with my emotional recovery.
    you need to understand that its nobody's fault when these things happen. your body just knew that there was something wrong and let the baby go. that is how it works. it took me a long time to realise that.
    dont blame your boyfriend for getting you pregnant, you both should have taken the responsibility to take precautions but that doesnt matter now.
    over time, you should be able to deal with your loss.
    i was scared, like you, when i had my loss. i had thoughts of never having a child ever because i didnt want to go through that heartache again. this happens to a lot of women and when its the right time for you, you will have a baby.
    i suggest you talk to people who have been through the same thing to understand that its okay that this happened. even get some therapy like i did. everyone deals with this sort of thing different. i wish you all the best in your recovery :) xx

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  • phillipphung94
    12 years ago | pl

    Tragedy is not something you learn to forget. Tragedy is something you learn to live with and gives you strength to fight in the name of the ones you've lost. So yes, it's absolutely normal for you to feel this way.

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