Its not your guilt because you havent done anything.Its an illnes and it can happen to everyone but the things you said to your mom are horrible.I know sometimes its hard to control yourself when you are angry or nervous but she is your mom and you cant change anything.Now dont feel guilty.Try to give her your care,love,attention as much as you can.There are so many people who lost their moms and wish she could have been there next to them.We are not friends with my mom and fight a lot but 3 months ago her sister died and when I saw the sorrow of her kids I just realized how much I love my mom.What refers to peoples sypathy I think you just need attention but please not in that way.Why dont you try to have goals to reach them and then people will talk about you
IIN that I kinda wished my mum had cancer so I could get sympathy?
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Its not your guilt because you havent done anything.Its an illnes and it can happen to everyone but the things you said to your mom are horrible.I know sometimes its hard to control yourself when you are angry or nervous but she is your mom and you cant change anything.Now dont feel guilty.Try to give her your care,love,attention as much as you can.There are so many people who lost their moms and wish she could have been there next to them.We are not friends with my mom and fight a lot but 3 months ago her sister died and when I saw the sorrow of her kids I just realized how much I love my mom.What refers to peoples sypathy I think you just need attention but please not in that way.Why dont you try to have goals to reach them and then people will talk about you