Bars are NOT the best place for meeting new people on your own. They are fun to go to with people you've already met, but flying solo is often a recipe for failure (unless you're exceptionally attractive and charismatic, which most of us aren't).
I recommend meeting people in a social environment with as few obstacles as possible; no loud music, alcohol or sexual expectation. Find some hobby or club which involves interacting with lots of other people (theatre, music, film club, book club etc.) and use that as an excuse to connect with new people and potentially lovely available ladies.
There's also always internet friend and date sites - you can find someone in your locality and get to know them before you meet, safe in the knowledge that they are as single and keen to find someone as you are :)
Well then why do other guys seem to have stories about the "crazy night out" where they wake up the next morning with a strange woman in their bed? Is that all just a myth?
Not that this is what I'm after, but the fact that going out I seem to feel just as lonely as staying in, I get the impression that I'm doing something wrong.
I also do do all those other things, the social groups, clubs, meetings, events, internet dating, etc, but it would be nice to have a fall back plan for when I'm lonely and those things aren't available.
Yeah there are guys who go out to clubs with friends and pick up girls and end up in bed with them the next day. One night stands are usually just sex, with very little prospect of ever developing into any form of relationship. But these guys go with friends, they have a social group to support them. As I said in my initial post, going on your own is usually a recipe for failure.
Go with a group (preferably of people who are outgoing and reasonably confident). If you don't have a group, try and use the social groups, clubs, meetings, events etc. to form one.
IIN that I'd be okay with a girl for RIGHT NOW, but don't know how?
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Bars are NOT the best place for meeting new people on your own. They are fun to go to with people you've already met, but flying solo is often a recipe for failure (unless you're exceptionally attractive and charismatic, which most of us aren't).
I recommend meeting people in a social environment with as few obstacles as possible; no loud music, alcohol or sexual expectation. Find some hobby or club which involves interacting with lots of other people (theatre, music, film club, book club etc.) and use that as an excuse to connect with new people and potentially lovely available ladies.
There's also always internet friend and date sites - you can find someone in your locality and get to know them before you meet, safe in the knowledge that they are as single and keen to find someone as you are :)
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10 years ago
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Well then why do other guys seem to have stories about the "crazy night out" where they wake up the next morning with a strange woman in their bed? Is that all just a myth?
Not that this is what I'm after, but the fact that going out I seem to feel just as lonely as staying in, I get the impression that I'm doing something wrong.
I also do do all those other things, the social groups, clubs, meetings, events, internet dating, etc, but it would be nice to have a fall back plan for when I'm lonely and those things aren't available.
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disthing
10 years ago
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Yeah there are guys who go out to clubs with friends and pick up girls and end up in bed with them the next day. One night stands are usually just sex, with very little prospect of ever developing into any form of relationship. But these guys go with friends, they have a social group to support them. As I said in my initial post, going on your own is usually a recipe for failure.
Go with a group (preferably of people who are outgoing and reasonably confident). If you don't have a group, try and use the social groups, clubs, meetings, events etc. to form one.