Is it normal that everyone seems to like me the least?
No one outright hates me (at least, I don't think so. I'm not sure.), but it seems like if I was put next to anyone else they would always pick that other person over me.
I'm a very introverted person and don't have the best personality (and by that I mean an incredibly poor one.) I like to keep to myself, I don't engage in social media, and sometimes I just don't talk.
This makes me think I just wasn't meant to socialize, or that I should change or else no one is ever going to genuinely enjoy my company. Not even my family likes hearing me talk.
RANT BELOW:
My friends always seem to know and hang out with way more people than I do, and they almost always do it without me. If I didn't ask them about it I would have never known.
I don't have a smartphone and I don't use social media. I think snapchat and stuff like that is stupid. I think this seriously harms my standing in this social circle.
I don't really talk normally either. Instead of talking about social stuff like a normal person I move towards abstract stuff and weird hypotheticals. It is too difficult for me to keep up with them; they talk about so many people and jump from conversation to conversation before I can come up with something to say. Most of the time I just sit there and listen because I don't see any point in giving input because I just don't care enough.
A part of me thinks my friends really don't like me either. Our group is a bunch of work obsessed nerds, so grades mean everything to us. The group seems to have this mentality of "you don't deserve to complain if you don't have it as bad as me." (Some have literally said that to other people, although not me specifically.) That being said, whenever I do better than them I feel like I don't deserve it. I got a 5 on two AP exams even though they got a teacher that gave an enormous amount of work (he pretty much worked them to the bone.)
I feel like a part of them think I don't deserve it either, and whenever I complain about something they talk behind my back. It is giving me a lot of anxiety just thinking about it.
~RANT ENDED~