IIN something's going on with men these days?

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  • You think it’s easy being in a war-torn country and doing back-breaking work tilling the fields and putting my mind to work pulling feats of engineering and mathematical wizardry that is nothing short of mythopoetic ?

    Everyday I wake up, stroke my glorious testosterone-grown beard and put on my heaviest armor.
    I break through the permafrost with my pickaxe and sew my beets.
    My godkingpresidentemporer is pumping iron shirtless on the black and white box tv and telling me to prepare for the next wave of war where we will be deploying bears.
    I grunt and nod and swig a fifth and light my stogie held between my grotesquely muscular and calloused hands.
    I… do mathimaticals of.. my… taxes… listen I didn’t finish school man I ride horses for a living what the fuck is mathematical wizar
    I CHOP WOOD WITH AXE BLYAT

    And late at night I turn away from my wife…. And all I can think of is… a blonde catboy Los Angeles Starbucks barista in a French maid outfit with a buttplug cattail and black nails with a they/them pronoun nametag and 15,000 followers on tumblr
    One day more… Kholat…. One day more….

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