Iin: loneliness, depression caused me to have sexual sadistic mind
I have never had a girlfriend or been in a relationship. I did consider myself a pacifist but alone and suffering from depression, anxiety, fear of death and fear of the worst has caused me to watch hardcore porn on the internet which has caused me to develop a sexual sadistic mind set where I am turned on by rape porn when ironically back in the past I was entirely against this!
How can I train myself to get out of this evil mind?