Is it normal im a lesbian but admire a man?

I am gay. I’ve spent way too long denying it and have finally accepted it so do not tell me i’m not. I’ve got a coworker 9 years older than me. He talks to me a lot about the job and sometimes when he is talking i just zone out because he is beautiful. I would not date him ever because i don’t feel attracted TO him but i do realize that he is attractive. Is this normal? Am i crazy? Am i thinking too deep into it? He is not conventionally attractive but he is to me and i can’t figure out why. I also enjoy his way of doing things. He gives off good vibes so maybe that’s why. Who knows.

Is It Normal?
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Comments ( 23 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • So you really like him as a person and you admire his appearance: what's to worry about?

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    • I suppose so I think i am just reading into it too much. I should question myself less

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  • I know when a man is attractive. Doesn't make me gay.

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    • thank you some people have a hard time understanding this

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  • you're just Bi😊

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    • I am not bisexual

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  • I can see an attractive woman and appreciate her beauty and her essence but men are the ones that make me sweat, quake and melt on the inside ;) you are normal lol.

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    • We are reversed thank you for understanding

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  • Tell him you're a lesbian and see how he reacts.

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  • He may be attracted to you as a possible sex partner. If that's the case he will be highly disappointed. Try and stear the conversation to relationships and see what he says. He may already be involved with someone. It's a possibility he might be gay and you two could have an amazing friendship.

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    • I don’t think he likes me as more than a friend. Neither of us have ever mentioned relationships. I hope he doesnt

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  • Just do what you FEEL like.

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  • Sexuality fluctuates. You don't have to keep a specific label on yourself and deny yourself of finding attraction in people just because you use a certain label.

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    • I do not care for labels I only use them so people may get a better understanding of things. I don’t deny it because of the label I deny it because this is not how i feel with a woman

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  • Have you considered a different sexuality, like pansexual or bisexual?

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    • No this is different. I do not want to have sex with him or a relationship with him either. When i am attracted to a woman, I feel more nervous and like i have a goal there, and I also want to have... sexual relations with her. When i talk to this man i feel calm as he is my friend and I do not want to have sex with him I only want to speak to him and get to know him better, sometimes i want to slow time down so i can observe him more. Maybe this is just all friends that feel this way?

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  • Put your butt on him

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