Ask Your Question today
What's important:
- man is not a complete pussy
- both people have functional reproductive organs
- income is enough to support offspring
Bullshit:
Personality, interests, hobbies, etc.
All that bullshit you don't like is very important in a long lasting relationship; otherwise all you're doing is picking people to mindlessly fuck until you get bored.
Plus, when a baby is born, what's keeping the parents together, the bond they should have to be a functional team in raising a stable family?
Duty to stick together, raise a family. All humans have the same basic interests and needs. If you're going to get nitpicky about details like which genre of tv shows or books you like, and base a marriage on that, maybe it's best to stay single and not join the ranks of divorced people.
Well i think i know what you mean. And based on the three first things you have written above in your post, i would say yes, it is quite normal to be in a relationship and even a life long relationship. But it is more common in non western societies, where feelings like love and interest are not the main criteria to enter a relationship. And these types of relationship do tend to last because the very foundation of them in not based on (usually) the individual interest of one person, where you have yourself and your standards whether it be on outer beauty or feelings, in the center and use that as a compass, and because there is no consistency in those things, one usually lose interest and leave the relationship.
And Tealights made a very good point where she says that love grows with time, and it can grow with time in relationships in which you enter when you fall in love with a person, but that is also true for relationships you are talking about. Now the quality of life in such relationship is debatable though, and that is why people usually want enter a relationship where they know they love a person before they enter it. But this is also true that the more you get used to a person the more you would like them to be there. And i think it's an interesting thing to think about. And i know many people who have entered a relationship without being in love with the person and they are living a very good life. And i even had the chance to ask few what was making them stay together like this, and they said it was more then just love, and that there is a sense of devotion that grows.
Getting married over liking the same television show or books is childish. Plus, marriage is unnecessary, unless you're religious; however, so many people use marriage to take their 1 year or so relationship to the "next step" when all it's doing is legally binding yourself to someone you hardly know.
What I'm talking about is genuine love. Love grows with time, acceptance, and understanding of who you're with, if compatible with that person. So yes, it starts with all the bullshit you've spoke of, because we all bond over something. The world is massive, filled with different cultures, likes and dislikes; which makes human attraction not as simple if you're considering raising a family with someone.
As for a sense of duty, go into low income and lower middle-class neighborhoods and ask how many children know of their father or mother? How many children are being raised by grandma while mom is out doing whatever. Or how many children have to deal with constant yelling and fighting, because mom and dad are always angry at each other over who watches the child, but stay together for the child, making the child the reason why they're miserable and struggling. Like common sense, that sense of duty isn't there for most people especially if you're reproducing so carelessly, because all that creates are broken homes and dysfunctional families.