a) you have too much life insurance. The money you are spending on excess insurance could be going to enrichment activities for your son to become more intelligent, culturally smart, and successful.
b) insurance won't pay for suicides. You will have to make your death look accidental beyond a reasonable doubt.
c) your kid will piss the money away on hookers and cocaine because of point d).
d) you need to be around to teach the kid personal finance, how to invest, how to start a business, and how to avoid financial pitfalls. This is all stuff he will be ready to learn when you are 40.
e) go work on your own retirement plan. Keep good notes so you can teach your kid how to do it.
f) stay away from cocaine and hookers. That stuff is only for massive dicks.
"You will have to make your death look accidental beyond a reasonable doubt."
Surely that's not too difficult. Driving late at night for a valid reason on a high-speed road and sudden head-on encounter with solid barrier.
Of course, insurance companies are greedy bastards who look for any excuse not to pay out, and I assume these days one of the routine things they do is scour the internet for evidence that the death was deliberate. OP may believe that his post here is anonymous, but if a company or individual is truly motivated to track down all internet activity by someone...
Just to state, suicide was never an option. I am fully aware of what is stipulated in the contract I signed. Thank you for the ideas though. I love the one with the car head on collision!
Sounds epic.
Nah im going to die from something like alcohol poisoning or some shit like that.
Oh and my insurance covers murder.. Soooo..
Walk up to a bunch of black london gang members.. Say "Sup" then throw a handful of cum in their faces..
If you're going that route, maybe you can kill two birds with one stone: if there's some asshole you really hate, figure out how to provoke him into a murderous rage in such a way that it's certain he'll be convicted of the crime.
a) I spend around £10pm on this plan. Its because of the stipulation that it ends when i turn 40 is the whole reason it is so ridiculously cheap. I dont even notice it.
b) Not suicidal, i am fully aware of the contract that i signed.
c) Good for him Ill be dead and therefore I hope he has a great time whatever the hell he does with all that cash monies.
d) No, that little bastard can figure things out himself. He will be a grown man. If he cannot figure shit out then he will need to figure out a way. He wont benefit from me holding his dick. Failure is its own reward. Builds character. Unless it kills you of course.
e) See D
f) Hey im supporting independent enterprises. Do more to support your local businesses. Im paying hookers so they can feed their kids. Im a actually such a good person if you look at it from a blind perspective. Just turns out that they suck my dick while im counting up the money is all.
Hmmmm. Big dick has little dick. The dicks fuck everybody. In the end, everyone eats shit and dies. I like your style; the plan may be smarter than voluntary misery from abstinence of all pleasure.
IIN I kinda need to die before 40 so my son can get paid
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Your plan is stupid as fuck. Here's why.
a) you have too much life insurance. The money you are spending on excess insurance could be going to enrichment activities for your son to become more intelligent, culturally smart, and successful.
b) insurance won't pay for suicides. You will have to make your death look accidental beyond a reasonable doubt.
c) your kid will piss the money away on hookers and cocaine because of point d).
d) you need to be around to teach the kid personal finance, how to invest, how to start a business, and how to avoid financial pitfalls. This is all stuff he will be ready to learn when you are 40.
e) go work on your own retirement plan. Keep good notes so you can teach your kid how to do it.
f) stay away from cocaine and hookers. That stuff is only for massive dicks.
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CozmoWank
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Boojum
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MasterChives
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I like C & D. They are so true.
"You will have to make your death look accidental beyond a reasonable doubt."
Surely that's not too difficult. Driving late at night for a valid reason on a high-speed road and sudden head-on encounter with solid barrier.
Of course, insurance companies are greedy bastards who look for any excuse not to pay out, and I assume these days one of the routine things they do is scour the internet for evidence that the death was deliberate. OP may believe that his post here is anonymous, but if a company or individual is truly motivated to track down all internet activity by someone...
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MasterChives
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Just to state, suicide was never an option. I am fully aware of what is stipulated in the contract I signed. Thank you for the ideas though. I love the one with the car head on collision!
Sounds epic.
Nah im going to die from something like alcohol poisoning or some shit like that.
Oh and my insurance covers murder.. Soooo..
Walk up to a bunch of black london gang members.. Say "Sup" then throw a handful of cum in their faces..
Problem Solved
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Boojum
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If you're going that route, maybe you can kill two birds with one stone: if there's some asshole you really hate, figure out how to provoke him into a murderous rage in such a way that it's certain he'll be convicted of the crime.
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MasterChives
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I like your style, but i don't have enemies. Anymore anyways.
But great thought still! Ill keep this in mind.
a) I spend around £10pm on this plan. Its because of the stipulation that it ends when i turn 40 is the whole reason it is so ridiculously cheap. I dont even notice it.
b) Not suicidal, i am fully aware of the contract that i signed.
c) Good for him Ill be dead and therefore I hope he has a great time whatever the hell he does with all that cash monies.
d) No, that little bastard can figure things out himself. He will be a grown man. If he cannot figure shit out then he will need to figure out a way. He wont benefit from me holding his dick. Failure is its own reward. Builds character. Unless it kills you of course.
e) See D
f) Hey im supporting independent enterprises. Do more to support your local businesses. Im paying hookers so they can feed their kids. Im a actually such a good person if you look at it from a blind perspective. Just turns out that they suck my dick while im counting up the money is all.
Gonna get me some of those ham sandwiches.
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McBean
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Dead5
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Hmmmm. Big dick has little dick. The dicks fuck everybody. In the end, everyone eats shit and dies. I like your style; the plan may be smarter than voluntary misery from abstinence of all pleasure.
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MasterChives
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Thank you good Sir. Now...
Cocaine and strippers all round!
*Crowd cheers*
A million times out of ten, hookers don’t have children.
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MasterChives
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.. Wait what?
So, what about all those single stripper moms? I mean its a pretty common stereotype.